Umakoti Ngo Wethu

12

We didn't stay long. I gave them my number and let Jabu spend a few minutes with them, but after that, I was out of there. "Wait... This isn't the way home." Thembi said from the back seat. "I know. We're going to the tavern. I can not be sober right now." I didn't know what was happening to me.

I just knew I was feeling feelings I wasn't ready to feel, handle, or regulate. I didn't know why, but I felt like I was feeling everything from all of the pain I've ever been through at once. What she said triggered me, and I just needed to be numb.

I went into the tavern alone and bought a few bottles of whatever they could give me and we went home. My sister just stared at me worriedly the whole way. When we got home, I was glad my parents were out back because I didn't even hide the bottles. I went to my room and started drinking straight out of the bottle.

"Litha, maybe you shouldn't be drinking."
"Thembi, if you're in here, you're drinking. If you're not drinking leave, please." She just sighed and left with Jabu on her hip.

Who does that old woman think she is!? She met my son one time and wanted to take him away from me!? If she didn't look like a shriveled up raisin getting ready to die, if the wind blew in the wrong direction, I would've given her a piece of my mind.

I locked myself in my room that night. Everyone tried to get me to open the door, but I finished the alcohol that I had and went straight to sleep. I didn't want to be awake to feel my emotions.

"Litha! Litha open this door! You have to eat something. Come on. Don't do this." I groaned. What was the time? I just knew the sun was streaming through my window really brightly. I got up while she kept knocking, and her knocking sounded like banging in my head. "I'm up, ma. Stop banging on the door." I heard a sigh of relief. "Okay, come eat something when you're ready." I heard whispers, and then I heard footsteps walking away.

I took a shower and got dressed. I looked terrible. My hair was an absolute mess, and my face was all puffy. For someone who slept for hours, I looked drained. I wrapped a scarf around my head and applied some concealer, which did absolutely nothing. I put my phone on charge and went to the kitchen.

"I warmed your plate and made you some coffee." She looked nervous. "Thank you, Ma." Just then, I heard Jabu screaming. "Mama! Want Mama! Mama!"
"I'll go get him." She said and walked out. His screaming got louder, and I got up just as she came into he kitchen with him. He almost jumped out of her arms into mine. "Mama!" He screamed, not helping my headache.

"I'm here, boy. What's wrong?" He just cried as I tried comforting him. My breakfast had to wait as it took almost an hour to get him to calm down. I felt so bad. If I didn't leave him yesterday he would've been fine. He was slowly falling asleep, and even in his sleep, he wouldn't let me go.

I ate and ma told me my father called a family meeting to discuss this situation. We all sat in the living room. I had my cup of coffee with me. "Thembi told me what happened and what was said. I promise you they won't take your child away from you. If push comes to shove, we'll take them to court. Screw traditional. Nobody is taking my grandson. I want to know from you: Does the father of your child feel the same way his family does?"

I sighed because I hadn't even spoken to him yet. "I don't know, Baba."
"Well, you have to find out. This is not the time to cower away in your room and numb yourself with alcohol. I know it may feel like you have plenty of reason to do so, but right now, you don't have a choice. This family has threatened you and your child. Now is the time to scrape up every last ounce of  energy you have left and fight. Okay?" I nodded.

I went straight to my room. I checked my phone and Jabu had been calling me so I called back. "Finally. I'm glad you called. Can you please explain what's going on? What happened?" I couldn't keep it in anymore. I broke down. "They want to take my baby." I couldn't help the tears falling down my face. "What? Wait, let me get ma... Okay, you're on speaker. Please explain what's going on. Start from the beginning."

"Your grandmother asked to see Jabu. Before we left, she said that Jabu is a Dlomo and he shouldn't be staying with me. He should be staying with her. She said she would convince you to take him from me." I cried like a baby. "Over my dead body!"
"Jabulani..."
"No, Ma! Gogo is being unreasonable, and frankly, she's going insane. Litha, nobody, and I mean nobody is going to take our son away from you. Nobody! I'll be there by tomorrow."

I felt a lot better about the situation, but I also knew that this was going to cause a lot of conflict between the families and between Jabu and his grandmother. I needed to follow my father's advice.

The next day, I was scared, but I knew I needed to do this for my son. So I took a deep breath and knocked on my father's door. "Come in!" He called, and I walked in. "Oh, Litha, I was just on the phone with MaRadebe. She misses you. You should call her." I nodded. "Baba, I have a very important request , and before you freak out about it, I think it's in the best interest of my son that you consider this." He put his paperwork down and gestured to one of the chairs.

"Baba, Jabu's father and grandmother are on their way here from the city. They were hoping to speak to you." He sighed. "About what? They're not taking my grandson."  I shook my head. "I don't think they would take him. He just wants to reassure us, and it's about time we sat down and spoke." He sighed again. "Fine. When will they be arriving. If they're in time, they can come to lunch." I couldn't help the smile that formed on my face. "They'll be here in time for lunch." He nodded. "Your sister and her husband can join us." Wait... Why? You know what? Nevermind. I'm not even going to try and wrap my head around this.

Thembi and I prepared lunch, and MaKhumalo greeted Jabu and his mother at the gate. Everyone seemed to be all civil and nice through dinner. Thando's husband filled the awkward silence, navigating the table through smalltalk.

"Okay, enough. Did you really think you and your family would take my grandson away from his mother?"
"Baba."
"No, Litha. Stay out of this. They sent a child to my house with a letter to fool me. Only to turn around and threaten you." Both Jabulani and his mother, looked confused. "Wait, I don't understand. What happened?" MaMthembu asked, confused.

"Don't act like you don't know know."
"I'm not acting. I really don't know. I only know what was told to me by litha. She visit d the homestead, and my mother-in-law threatened to take Jabu." My father looked extremely annoyed and angry. "Baba, we have no reason not to believe them. They weren't here. Maybe if I just explain to them what happened, you'd see that we might have the same interests."
"MaKhumalo, stop trying to keep the peace. You kept the peace when they came here asking to see my grandson and his mother returned in shambles. Stop with this thing of always wanting peace." My father was being completely unreasonable.

"Bab'Gumede, I can assure you we don't know what happened. We would like to be informed so that we know which steps to take to rectify this." He sighed and motioned towards MaKhumalo. "A little girl from your family showed up here with a written letter requesting visitation with little Jabu. We agreed, and Thembi accompanied Litha and the baby. Your grandmother was happy to see him buvangry that an imbeleko ceremony had not yet been done.
She also had a few choice words for my daughter about having a child with a married which I don't appreciate. Litha is my child and I won't allow anyone to talk to my child like that. What made the situation worse is that she told my daughter her son does not belong to her."

I couldn't keep it in. My tears started falling. "What kind of person does that? We do not owe your family anything. This baby was birthed by a Gumede. We will use all the resources we have to fight you in court if you even think about taking our grandson away." Thando handed me some tissues and I could wipe my tears.

"Bab'Gumede." Jabulani started. "I will never take my son away from his mother. Not in a million years. I don't know why that letter was sent. If I wanted my son to meet he rest of the family I would take him there myself. And I would've. I'll be here more often from now on and I was planning on requesting to take Jabu to his family. I do not like what happened here at all. I have a few unresolved issues with my family that I didn't disclose to MaGumede. I do not want my son on the homestead without me there. Especially not after what happened."

"So, are you saying we should deny any further request for them to see the boy?"
"Yes."
"Good. Now, I want to know from you when you'll be having an imbeleko ceremony for my grandson or are you going to wait until something happens to him for you to take action?"
"I would like to have the ceremony as soon as possible. I just need a few days to consult with my elders."

Just like that they left. I didn't even get time to say hello to him. I want to at least spend some time with him but my dad was not having it.