Umakoti Ngo Wethu

40

I came to pretty quickly. As soon as everyone saw I was okay, Gogo took charge. "Give me the baby and get out. I won't repeat myself." They hesitated but handed him over. "Hi. Everyone is here." Nthombifuti said excitedly. Her face dropped when the two ladies pushed past her. I couldn't keep it in anymore. The floodgates burst.

"What's going on? Did I say something?" I bawled my eyes out while Baba held me. It was just too much. I couldn't do it. The sounds of my sons cries moved furthered away. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry I allowed them to do this to you. I promise from now on I'll do better." I just nodded, trying to calm down.

I didn't know what to do with myself.  I had a damn panicking attack.  Luckily, Sphe came to check on us. I totally forgot we had an appointment. I was just so tired. As soon as Sphe was done, I went to sleep. I needed it.

I was woken up by Xolani's cries. I instantly knew he was hungry. Just when I was about to get out of bed, Baba came into the room. "Oh, good. You're awake. He's awake and hungry." I stretched my hands out to him. I fed my baby, and he went right back to sleep after I burped him.

"How do you do it?"
"Do what, Baba?"
"All of it. I'm exhausted." I laughed to myself. "I have you." He smiled a little bit, but his smile faded. "But the first time you didn't have me." I just sighed. "Don't think about the past, Baba. Just focus on the present. Now help me up, please." He was at my side of the bed in no time.

I was surprised to find my sisters and Gogo in the kitchen cooking. "You're up." Nthombifuti came to hug me. "Litha, we're sorry about ma. We've asked  Baba to speak to her. He said he would." I just nodded. "What are you making?" I changed the topic. "Just a couple of salads. We started a fire and we're going to braai. We want to spoil you and Baba ka Jabu after what you've had to go through."
"Oh my God. Jabu. Where is he?"
"Calm down. He's taking a nap. He's in his room."

We spent the evening chit-chating. Gogo told us so many stories about growing up here in the village, and for a moment, I was happy. Until my father walked in with MaKhumalo by his side. Following them was MaMthembu and her husband Bab'Dlomo. "Do we not have locks or something?" I asked Baba, who already looked ready to fight.

"We apologize for the intrusion, but we need to sit down as a family and discuss this." Bab'Dlomo announced. "Oh, the two of you have got some nerve." Gogo said. "Nothing is going to be discussed today. These two shouldn't even step foot in this house until they've realized what they are doing is wrong."

"How is it wrong? I know Litha and I know how she is once she gives birth. With Jabu, she was a complete and utter mess! I had to drag her out of bed every day.  We just want to make sure our grandchild doesn't have to go through that. Especially since she recently went to a mental institution."
"What? MaKhumalo, do you hear yourself?"
"Litha, I want to help. I need to make sure you're raising our my grandchildren the right way. I need to make sure that you're looking after yourself. I need to know that you aren't a danger to yourself and the baby, especially after what happened with Jabu."

"And what exactly happened with Jabu that makes you think that I would harm myself or my son?" I wanted to hear her reasoning. I don't understand how she could completely change into this monster every time one of us has a baby. "Makoti, there's no need to hide it. We know you suffer from postpartum depression. We were trying to keep it quiet, but you're forcing our hand."
"Ma? What kind of sick person are you?"
"Litha, I only told MaMthembu so that both of us can be on high alert. When you had Jabu, you were a mess. I couldn't let you traumatize another child..."

"Get out! You two! Get your wives and get out! How dare you come into my house and disrespect my wife and the mother of my children like this!"
"My boy, she's unstable. She's fresh out of a mental institution."
"Ma, I dare you to say that one more time. You will never see me or my children again. Get out of my house! The only unstable people here are the two of you! Get out!"

I didn't know what to do with myself. I just stood there in shock. "Litha, please, my baby. Let us help." Tears fell from my eyes. My gaze met my father's, and he just looked guilty. "MaKhumalo, let's go." He said to his wife. She tried putting up a fight, but he insisted and got her to leave. The others followed.

I didn't want people around me anymore, so we asked Gogo and my sisters to give us some time alone. "Baba, I don't understand what's happening.  What did I do? Have I been showing any signs of being depressed? Have I done anything to harm either of our children? What did I do?"

"You haven't done anything they're accusing you of. You've been the greatest mother I've ever seen. Jabu and xolani are lucky to have you. There's something wrong with our parents. I also don't know what's happening. I pictured this time in our lives a lot differently. I'm enjoying every second except for when our mothers walk through the door. I wanted my mother to bond with Xolani from birth because things were different with Jabu. I was so excited to have our parents here, but now I'm just disappointed in them." Hearing that he had the same feelings as I did made me feel so much better.

We spent the next day alone with our boys, and then we had a photoshoot planned. When Xolani was born, we took him to the local clinic. That was the only time we left the house with him. Driving into town was a bit nerve-racking but we made it. We were in town at six in the morning already because I needed to get my hair and makeup done. We did our little family shoot and then went to eat lunch. The day was so calm that I didn't want to go home. Jabu was having the time of his life with all our attention being on him for most of the day.

The mothers were waiting at our doorstep. They came to knock on my window. "So you have time to do your hair but you can't pick up your phone!" MaKhumalo shouted from the other side of the window. If I wasn't in the car she would've been all up in my face. "If the two of you don't move away from the car I'll drive over your feet." They just kept yelling and our babies started crying. "Baba just drive. I dont know where we're going to go but let's just leave." Without hesitation he drove off.

I got my sons to calm down and we went back to town. Luckily we got a spot at the only bed and breakfast there was and spent the night there. We finally got some peace and quiet.

We spent a couple of days there. I told my sisters we were safe but I then had to put off my phone. I was playing with my babies when Baba's phone rang. "Baba, it's MaShezi." He busy in the bathroom. "Could you pick it up please." I took a breath and did it reluctantly. I didn't want this to cause more issues.

"MaMkhulu."
"Oh my God. Please don't call me that." I chuckled a little bit and put her on speaker. "Is Dlomo there?"
"He's in the bathroom shaving his beard."
"Hello!" Jabu said into the phone. "Hi Jabu. How are you doing, baby?"
"Fine!" He said and giggled. "I've been getting crazy phone calls from Ma. What is going on?" I just sighed. "Oh, lord. What happened now?" Baba came out of the bathroom. "Here's Baba. I'll let him tell you." He looked confused. "Your mother has been harassing MaShezi."

"What?"
"Yes, she's been calling and just shouting. I don't know why, but she mentioned the two of you and the baby. What is going on? Do I need to come over there?" He sighed. "Your mother-in-law and MaGumede's mother have been driving us insane. We're not even in our home right now. We had to leave. We've been staying at a bed and breakfast in town. That's how bad it is."
"That is ridiculous. You should not have to leave your home because of them. Have you spoken to the elders?"
"We've tried everything. They just get worse."

"Listen, I know we aren't on the best terms but do you want me to come over there and play guard? You can't let the baby spend his first month in a bed and breakfast. That's not right. I swear I'll behave myself and stay out of your way but I'll keep the grannies out of your way?" He looked at me and I was really considering it. I missed my house. I nodded and then he nodded. "Okay, I'll send a driver. When would you like to come?"
"I'll come tomorrow." It was sorted.

This could either be very good for us or it could go terribly.