Society | A Evan Lennon Story

10 - Overthinkers

I walk into form and sit at my desk after I drop my bag by my chair. "Hey, guys." I say.

"Hey."

"Hi, Evan."

"Have you guys spoken to Zamora?" I ask and Barrett shakes his head.

Celeste says, "No, I haven't seen her."

I huff and look down and Barrett seems to notice because he asks, "Are you okay?"

I look at him. "Fine. Why?"

He shrugs. "You seem.. not fine."

I smile softly and nod at him as I reach out to squeeze his shoulder. "I'm alright." I say. "Just tired." I bring my hands in front of me. "I didn't get much sleep last night, Bella slept over and-"

"Woah, back up!" I huff, the immediate regret I was hit with was noticed by them, but Celeste continues anyway. "You slept with Bella?"

"No, no, no." I say a little too quickly. "She slept over." I corrected her but I sigh and say, "After I slept with her the night before..." Celeste gasps. Barrett seems shocked and a bit hurt. "But it won't be happening again." I notice I'm staring intently at Barrett as I say this, but ultimately, choose to ignore the fact and I look at Celeste because she laughs.

"Yeah, we've heard that before." She says.

"I'm serious. We talked about it and we've decided to just be friends, for good this time." I say.

"We'll see." She says, then the bell rings. "I gotta go. I'm gonna meet Gabby round hers." She says as she stands and collects her things. Then, she's gone. It was unusual for Celeste to skip school, but I think it's just because she has a new girlfriend and wants to spend as much time as possible with her. Barrett turns toward me from watching Celeste. I look at him.

"..Did you want to come round mine after school?" He asks. "To study?"

I smile. "Sure." He smiles and I pat his shoulder. "Come on." I walk past him and he follows me.

"Did you really mean what you said?"

I look at him. "What?"

"About Bella?"

"Yeah, we're just friends."

"Everything okay with Zamora?"

I look away. I don't respond for a few seconds but eventually say, "I don't know."

It's quiet. Then, Barrett asks, "Everything okay between us?"

This was more hesitant than his other questions, but I look at him and smile and force out a soft laugh but it was more nervous than anything. "What?" I say, my voice just as nervous as my laugh. "Why wouldn't it be?" I ask.

We stop at his class and he says, "I don't know. Lately, you've been different towards me, like you forgot how to act around me." I stare at him because I don't know what to say. He continues. "Maybe, things are a little awkward after what I told you?"

I shake my head. "No, I-" I absentmindedly take his hand and when I do notice, I take it back and shove my hands into my trouser pockets. "We're okay." I say. "I've just had a lot on my plate these past couple days.. Kate and Zamora and Bella, I guess it's just been a lot." I meet his eyes, he's staring at me with concern. "I guess, I didn't realize just how much shit I had going on til I said it out loud." I say in an attempt to lighten the mood. "It's kinda funny, innit?"

"If you think so..."

I look at him then past him and I see Ben walking our way. My smile fades and I take Barrett's shoulder and pull him over to me, so I could lead him into the classroom as I say, "I'll talk to you later." He says something, but I don't hear. I walk in Ben's direction but I don't say anything because I told Kate I wouldn't, but that doesn't stop him from watching me as I walk by. I look away once he's out of my sight and I meet eyes with the same girl from before across the hall, she was the one that knew who I was on the field, but I didn't know who she was. She smiles and waves. I just smile and turn and continue walking.

At lunch, I make sure to get to our spot sooner, so I could talk to Zamora before the others came round. When I get there, she's sitting, on her phone. I sigh in relief because I'm glad she's okay. I sit across from her and she smiles up at me. "Hey, Ev." She says.

I furrow my eyebrows. "Hey.."

"Do you think Celeste will be here? She promised to help me with my coursework but I know she was with Gabby."

"I don't-" I stop myself and shake my head, remembering why I wanted to talk to her. "Are we okay?" I ask.

She looks up at me from her phone again and says, "Yeah, why?"

"You've been ignoring my texts." I say.

Her eyes go unfocused, like she was trying to think back without having to look at me. "Oh!" She looks at me. "Right, I remember. I didn't text you because I thought it was silly for you to ask that." She says and I grow more confused.

"You thought me making sure you were okay was a joke?" I ask.

"No, of course not. I just didn't want you to worry about me over something so trivial."

I shrug. "Well, I worried anyway." I say. "I thought I had ruined any friendship I had with you when I said I didn't like you because you didn't text me back."

She laughs nervously. "Woah, Evan, calm down. It's not that big of a deal." I watch her in a way that would indicate I was still rather confused, maybe a bit upset. "You sure do seem to overthink a lot, don't you?" I look down. "You worry about everyone else before yourself, that's going to come to harm you later."

"Hey, guys."

I look up and smile at Barrett. "Hey." He sits down and removes his jumper. I look at Zamora as she talks to Barrett. She's right. I do worry, I put others needs before my own but that's just who I am, there's no harm in it, right?