Magcon: Can you feel my heart? // cash

Chapter 25

•Goner•

|unedited|

Lyrics:

Though I'm weak and beaten down,

I'll slip away into this sound,

The ghost of you is close to me,

I'm inside-out, you're underneath.

Nashs POV:

The wind is gently moving my little hairs in the opposite direction of the quick quiff I made. My hands in my pockets and my weak legs dragging me where ever. The wind starts to pick up and I squint my eyes. I look across the street to see the park I always go to. It's always helped me through my problems and it's saved me once. This park is my only friend, it doesn't leave like everyone else.

As I near it I see a notice paper on the fence around it. My heart drops at the words across the top in messy red ink that read "park due to close in September 2015".

I rip it up and throw it into the garbage can near by. A little girl is sitting by the fence where a paper is hanging and crying to her mother.

"Mom I love this park! Make them stop!" She cried into her arms.

Her mom gently rubs her back, "I can't, they need this space to build a new house."

If only I had the strength to cry over this but I haven't been able to do so in a while. I might as well enjoy this park while it still lasts. T-minus 6 months until this park gets destroyed and built into something less meaningful.

I still can't help but think I should go back and cuddle with cameron because Im pretty sure I took his virginity.

The swing beside me slowly swings in the wind. It squeaks at an irritable pace. The rust on the chains scraping against each other, twirling itself into a mess. I can't help but want to fix it but not feeling able to for some reason. My feet get caught in the wood sticks laid on the playground floor. The dirt underneath making itself visible to me.

I feel like I can hear the small cries coming from Cameron.

Camerons POV:

That asshole just left me here in pain. The aftermath of sex hurt like a bitch and I can't handle it. My bum aching from the forceful thrusts that once seemed like heaven. I am never doing that ever again.

I'm in too much pain to get up and leave yet I want the smell of him to fill my nose. The smell of strawberries and summer covering his pillows and blanket. I grabbed onto the blanket and cuddle with that instead. He won't come back until he knows I'm gone. I just don't understand why he's so afraid to admit his feelings for me yet he isn't at the same time. We just had sex for crying out loud and he left like a little bitch. He stole the only thing my body claimed as it's own. We were suppose to tell each other "I Love you". Three words that could've changed our future together.

I'm tired of getting my heart broken for no reason. I'm tired of feeling special and then realizing I'm not at all. I want to feel what it's like to be loved and return the feeling. I want to be able to call someone mine. God how I wish I had something with Nash. It seems as if his past is the only thing that's holding him back, but he won't seem to say anything. He's living in the past and it's going to kill him one day.

"Hey Nash do you still have," Hayes says quietly knocking on the door before opening it," my game I lent you-"

I quickly covered myself, embarrassed by the fact I could've been found naked.

"Hey Cameron," He says pausing what he was saying.

He looked at me and it took him a while to process everything. He stared at my clothes lying on the floor and my body in an awkward position under the covers.

"Did you and Nash," He said not continuing the sentence.

"Yeah," I sigh awkwardly.

"Well where is he?" he asks entering the room.

"He left," I respond.

"Not surprised," He scoffs.

I look at him questionably and he begins to explain.

"This isn't the first time I've walked in on his one night stands, but it is the first time I've walked in on one of his friends."

I roll on my back and place my hand on my forehead, "I messed up."

"How so?"

" I let him take me," I say, my voice slightly cracking as a tear starts going down my face.

"Not to be mean but that's usually what he aims for."

I hit my hands on my sides on the bed. I let him play me like his others. I bet I was just another name to put in his book of one night fucks.

"Do you need any help?" He asks awkwardly.

"Can you get me my clothes please," I point to the pieces of clothing spread around the room.

He goes around and picks them up and handing them to me. He looks at me like he is sincerely sorry for the pain his brother has caused me.

"I'll tell him you never want to see if again if you want me to. That's usually what they request," He says walking to the door.

"I don't know about that but sure,"

"I don't think he'll ever find love," he says.

"why?"

"He's a goner."

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My updates take hella long to upload and they hella shitty. Tried to make this one better but its bad lol. Summer break is coming up in 2 days for me :)))

word count: 899

byes~