𝗖𝗨𝗣𝗜𝗗. jungwon

🏹 fifty-nine

it had been a month since the break up. it had been a month since haeun last heard about jungwon too. well, not like she could since she blocked him.

it was one hell of a month for her, having to manage all her bottled up feelings, her life and school all at the same time while missing jungwon like crazy. the more she stayed away from him, the more he didn't seem to leave her mind as she helplessly tried to move on from him. she keeps trying to remind herself why she dumped him in the first place, but every time it just feels like it's a mistake.

perhaps she was wrong to end things so quickly without hearing him out first.

no, there was nothing to explain. he was still hanging out with minji when she was curled into a ball on her bed crying her heart out, the picture was pretty clear. she knows the way things ended between them was so abruptly but she couldn't afford to talk to him right in front of minji.

the phone that was resting beside her on her desk brought her back to reality, vibrating slightly as an unregistered number was displayed on the incoming call screen. she frowned a little bewildered at the sight, but she swiped right anyway as she brought the device close to her ear.

"hello?" there was dead silence from the other side of the call, her brows knotting further and she double checked her phone to make sure it was on and the call was still on going. "is anyone there?"

"haeun?" haeun's eyelids fluttered closed shut upon hearing the familiar voice, pressing her lips into a thin line as she felt a rush of emotions flow through her veins just by hearing the voice she longed for. the girl cleared her throat and fixed her posture despite him not even being able to see her, pushing back a strand of her chocolate waves out of her face by threading her fingers through them.

"jungwon? why are you calling me?" truth to be said, she thought she had blocked his number everywhere so she's surprised he found a way to be able to communicate with her. he must be calling from another number, and that could only mean he is desperate to talk to her.

"i miss you so much haeun. i miss everything about you and i'm actually starting to lose it. i can't get over you and how you made me feel." she swore she could feel the back of her eyes burn with tears as she listened to him pouring his heart out to her, remaining quiet yet still keeping the phone near her ear while letting out shaky breaths.

"all i can think about is us and how badly i messed up. everyday without you is agonizing for me and i miss you in every way a person could be missed. i just want—" jungwon's sentence was interrupted midway by heeseung who snatched his own phone from the drunk boy's hand, earning drunken whines from him whilst he uselessly tried to get back the device from the older guy.

"sorry about him haeun, he's just a bit drunk and he asked me if he could borrow my phone. i'll hung up now." just as he was about to press the red circular button in the lower part of the screen, a message notification made him halt on his actions momentarily before a sigh was heaved out by him.

heeseung had actually invited jungwon out for a drink or two, planning to catch up with him since he's been so caught up in his life with having to manage his love life and his job. but due to the exasperation this break up has brought up to him, jungwon went overboard with the drinks until he was a drunk, sobbing mess.

"shit, my girlfriend needs me. listen haeun, is it a problem if i ask you to come pick him up? i know you're not on good terms but all of our friends are busy and i can't leave him alone here drunk." she hesitated for a moment, her lips parted as a sharp breath slipped past them whilst she reflected if she should go or just refuse the offer. while it is true that leaving him alone in a bar drunk is not a good idea, she can't help but feel as if it's a wrong decision to give in and see him one more time at his lowest state.

"fine, i'll come, what's the name of the bar?"

and that's how she ended up with a drunk jungwon clinging on her as they walked back home, his arm around her shoulder while she held his waist to maintain his weight up since he was barely even conscious by how much alcohol he consumed and he murmured some nonsense sentences under his breath.

after pushing his keys into the serrature and gently opening the main door using her foot, haeun placed his dead weight on the couch to which he whined loudly due to lack of contact between them as he outstretched his arms out to reach for her only for them to fall limply down his sides.

the brunette heaved out a deep sigh, walking towards the kitchen to get him a glass of water so that he would sober up a bit and she would be able to leave before things got awkward between the two of them. she doesn't want him to think there is anything she is trying to save between them or that she is welcoming back into her life. as much as she misses him, their relationship would only get destroyed by minji once again.

"here, drink this." the girl carefully handed him the glass full of water, seating herself beside his weak body before fishing her phone out of her sweatpants pocket and turning it on just to notice how late it had got.

haeun stood from her previous spot, clearing her throat to grab his attention before looking down at him and meeting eyes with his shiny, dreamy, boba ones that she missed gazing into so much. she felt nothing different from him, but for the meantime it's better if she focuses on moving on rather than holding onto the past.

"i should probably go now, take care of yourself jungwon. goodnight—" jungwon briskly grabbed her wrist as soon as she began to walk away, pulling her on him which resulted in her above him with noses grazing against eachother and an unsteady pace of heartbeats.

"don't go yet, stay with me a little longer." his galaxy-filled irises pleaded her to stay with him and his lips were curved downwards into a pout, his cheeks flushed due to the drinking and because of what had just happened whilst his hand slowly wrapped around her waist. he can't let this chance slip through his fingers, not now that could be the last time he'll be able to have her so close to him.

"jungwon, we both know this is wrong . . " she murmured under her breath without breaking the eye contact, feeling out of breath once his delicate touch grazed her cheek ever so gently while his other hand caressed the area of her waist under her t-shirt. she doesn't know how much she'll be able to resist without giving in if he keeps being so soft with her.

"push me away if you don't want this then. push me away and i'll leave you alone." the girl didn't move a muscle, her eyes now traveling all the way down to his soft, defined, kissable lips that she longed to feel on hers one last time before letting go. the distance had killed her just as much as it killed him, and she honestly doesn't know how much she could endure this longer.

noticing how she didn't move a bit, jungwon placed a hand behind her nape and let their lips collide on eachother one more time, a feeling of joy spreading through his chest as the familiar sensation of being at home washed over him.

i'm depressed this book is basically over