Tainted : Unneeded love

DEMONS

The Kingdom of Nizwalah always had something amazing to it. Whether it was the beautiful flowers, the vibrant people or the amazing food, there was never dull moment in that kingdom but how can a place be so perfect. Nothing is perfect, there had to be something wrong and there was. Dark secrets in the royal family.
The king, Kiyar and his queen Chandrina had been ruling over the kingdom for years. They had four children,two daughters and two sons. Their daughters were very magical in their own way and their brothers were as ordinary as can be.

Sidrani

The smell of vodka and cigarettes hit me as I woke up. I took a huge sniff of it till it filled my lungs then I was content. Last night was the worst night of my life. I mean every night is the same since I was fifteen years old. Cutting, smoking and drinking. My nightly routine. No one really knew, just my brother Zaid. I cleaned my room and took and shower. I went downstairs for food. I stared at the food that was dished up for me. It didn't look appetizing at all. I wasn't going to force myself to eat this. "Sidrani aren't you going to eat ?" asked my stepmother. "No, and its Sidra." I sighed. "Can I be excused from breakfast?" I asked lowly. I stood up waiting for an answer . "No, sit." answered my dad. "Ohk." I answered walking away. "Sidrani, I'm talking." he trailed on
"And? How does that affect me?" I asked.
"I am talking to you. You do not walk away from me." he put forth. "And who are you to tell me that?" I asked. I knew at this moment I messed up. I was high. "I am your father and king. You will respect your Queen and respect me as well." he hissed.
"Respect is earned." I answered. His eyes widened. He was shocked. I gave a obviously fake smile and walked away. It hadn't been the first time we had this little argument that he was my father and I had to respect him. Respect works both ways.
I went to watch my brothers training after that encounter. I sat by the benches with my legs crossed. To make my brothers training more exciting they had to fight over me their "object" but I was secretly going to fight against them to spice things up. I was blindfolded. "Ready Sidra?" asked Zaid. I nodded. Alot happen. I couldn't really see but I felt a different person's hands on me. I know my brothers' touch. But these hands were cold, I felt this person energy and it was really dark. I tried get away from their grip but I couldn't. I felt a cold metal against my neck. It was sword. "Won't you beg me to let you go?" said a cold male voice. It was rough and coarse. "No, I don't do begging but I'll make you beg for your life." I said pushing and getting out of his grip. I dodged his sword without even seeing it. "You have impressive skills, princess." he said. "Don't try to flatter me." I answered. Iforced my sword against something and I felt something go through me. Blood came out from my blood and when I tell thats the worst thing anyone can taste. Its horrible. I fell to the ground and took off my blindfold.
Zaid and Ishan were running to me. "Sidra keep your eyes open." said Zaid. "I'm not dying, just take me to the hospital idiots." I jokingly said. Zaid carried me and already I hated every part of this. I didn't like being touched by anyone especially my brothers.
I tried keeping my eyes open but I couldn't. I closed them. As soon as I closed my eyes, I saw myself in a dark corner, with blood everywhere. "Thats you right?" said a voice. I nodded but I knew I had never seen myself like that. "Thats not you, its your fear ." the voice said. I stared at myself. She looked so weak. "My fear?" I hesitated slowly. "Yes, you fear yourself and I'm going to use that against you." said the voice breathing against me. I turned back. No one was there when I turned back. She was in front of me with a dark smile. I froze. She smirked and tilted her head. Her eyes a dark purple. "Weak." she whispered. "I'm not." I answered. She pushed me against the wall grabbing my neck. I was fighting to breath. She was feeding off me. I could hear a male's chuckle. It was dark and I felt chills down my spine. I was shrivelling up then I woke up. I was breathless. My stomach hurt like heck. "Sidra, are you okay ?" asked my stepmother. I really didn't want to argue.
I just nodded. I was in so much pain. "You are no longer allowed to participate in your brothers training sessions. Thats an order. Chandrina lets go." hissed my father. I rolled my eyes. "Its for the best, trust me. He cares for you." said my stepmother reassuringly. "He sure has a weird way of showing it." I sighed. She gave a small smile and her veil dropped. She picked it up. Her arms had bruises. I pretended as though I hadn't seen it and it didn't trigger me. "I'll be leaving now. You'll get better." she whispered touching my shoulders. I smiled and she left. Zaid came in. "Need a cigarette?" he asked. "Yes please." I answered. "You're going to need it." he muttered under his breath. He put an hand through his black hair. His brown eyes looked worried. "What?" I asked taking the cigarette. " You're not allowed to leave the house anymore." he answered lighting my cigarette. "What the actual heck?! He didn't say that!" I argued. "When you're discharged tomorrow, he'll tell you." laughed Zaid. I stood by the window smoking. I didn't like any of this. I wasn't going to be cooped up in the house. How was I going to smoke or drink? All this just got on my nerves. I sat in the hospital alone. All I could do was write. I wrote a poem.

𝐒𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩

Is it okay to abuse sleep?
I know it seems impossible
What if you slept instead of living?
What if you avoided your problems by sleeping?
What if you could fix every problem by sleeping?
Can sleep be addiction?
The way the mind wonders
Can it be a drug?
If we all use it so much
Escaping reality
The smoke making me euphoric
Starving myself day and night
Watching my blood drip from my wrists
My thighs cut
I get high and sleep
My only way of living
𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓻𝓪𝓷𝓲

I slept after that. I just wanted to stay asleep. I hoped the doctors didn't see my cuts. If they did I was going to lie again. I always lied. No one seemed to really notice it.