Heart Beat

Fears

"We need to talk."

"Where are you?"

"The pond."

"Wait there, I'm coming love."

Simon put down the phone and sighed.  She'd gone alone that morning.  She'd wanted to pretend it was nothing.  Just routine.  Not the lifechanging thing it was.  Now, she was back and wanted to talk.  His stomach churned.  He turned to Angie "I - I have to go.  Jenny - she needs me.  At the pond." he looked at her and for all the world, she thought he looked like a frightened little boy.  Her heart was in her mouth, Jenny meant the world to her too.  But this wasn't about her, was it.  This was about Simon and Jenny and the horrible, horrible black monster chasing them.

"Go.  Take as long as you need.  Just promise me?  Promise me as soon as you can, you'll tell me too?" she held his hand, feeling it shaking.  He nodded.  Angie was family, Angie was safety and comfort.  Angie was... everything to them.  

"Phone Tom, get him to come over? " the unspoken inference, that she would need him too, scared them both.  Angie bowed her head, tears that she didn't want him to see forming.

"Ok. " she said softly. "Now, go.  She needs you.  I'll get Graham to mind the shop. Come to mine when you're ready ok?"  She squeezed his hand then stood, drawing him up with her. "Time to be brave Big Brother.  Time to be THAT man.  The man you've always been for me.  Be it for Jenny." she hugged him tightly, feeling his shuddering breaths as he tried to compose himself.

"Ok, see you later, get that kettle at the ready ok?" with that he was gone.  After she heard the shop door close, she walked through to the dark room where Graham was developing some images from a wedding he'd been shooting the previous week.  

"Like them?" he said without looking up "Bride wanted all black and white.  Real old-school.  I think she looks amazing, but then, I don't really have any taste when it comes to wo.....men." his voice tailed off as he heard a small whine behind him.  Looking up, Angie was standing looking at him, her face awash, her knuckles in her mouth.  "Oh sweetie.  Come here!" he pulled her into a hug and she broke her heart.  He was up to speed with the whole Jenny scenario and he was pretty much up to speed with the Tom one now too.  "Sit down and I'll go phone him."

Angie sat on the little chair, hands over her face, sobbing.  For Simon, for Jenny and for the vastly unfair way that they'd been singled out for this awful thing.  Graham stood next to her, one hand on her shoulder, the other calling Tom.  He had his number from the shop records for the Loki shoot.

"Tom?  Is that you?" he paused and looked at Angie who was silently heaving. "It's Graham, yes , hi.  No, she's not.  Can you come?  It's Jenny.  No, I don't know but I can't imagine it's good.  Angie needs you.  I will, thanks, and Tom?  For what it's worth?  I'm so glad you're around."

Half an hour later, Angie and Graham were sitting in the little kitchen, hugging when Tom walked in.  He didn't say a word, just walked up to them and put a hand on Graham's shoulder.

"Thanks, thanks for being there for her." he said quietly and Graham nodded. "I'm glad she has you - and David is it? Yes, I'm glad she has you two to look out for her when I can't. "  Graham stood and kissed Angie on the cheek. 

"Tom's here lovie, I'll be through the front if you two need anything." he waited till she'd nodded that she understood then walked away with a smile at Tom. "You need ANYTHING you just call ok?"  Tom nodded.

He sat down at the table with her and she silently wound her arms around him and held him.  Her heart was breaking and she felt fear like she'd never known.  Even her own parent's passing hadn't been this bad.  They'd been old, it's what parents did, even if you loved them the way she did.  Nothing could change that.  But this?  This wasn't fair.  This was too soon.  She looked up at Tom, "It's not fair.  They don't deserve this.  She's beautiful.  Inside and out.  Why her?  Why Tom?"

"I don't know darling." he shook his head and stroked her forehead gently "I just don't know.  I'm here for you though, I always will be. You're safe with me, we don't have to go anywhere you don't want to.  Do anything you don't want to."

After a couple of minutes, she said "We need to go home. I said we would see them at home." Tom nodded. 

"Yours? Mine?" 

"Mine." 

"Ok, come on.  Can you walk?" he wasn't being dramatic, she looked like a good gust of wind would knock her over.  She nodded though, sniffing back the worst of her emotions.

"Yeah, let's go.  I could murder a cuppa." she smiled a watery smile "Think I'm dehydrating!" 

Tom laughed softly "there's my girl, right there. Come on little one, tea and cuddles it is."

They walked to the front shop and told Graham they were leaving.  He hugged her tightly and told her to forget about "the bloody shop" for as long as she needed to.  He was happy to look after it, happy to help look after her.  She smiled, it was strange how far they had all come in so short a time.  "Speak to you later." she said and kissed his cheek, then left.

As she drove home in Tom's car, leaving hers parked at the shop, she looked out the window.  It was a bright sunny day.  People were smiling as they walked.  They weren't hunched over, battling the elements.  The sky was blue and the street seemed vibrant and alive.  It was at times like these you notice the little things, she thought.  As they passed the park, she wondered if Jenny and Simon were still there.  She couldn't see them, but that didn't mean anything.

She prayed, for the first time in a VERY long time, she prayed.  For Jenny - to be well and for Simon - that if she wasn't he would have the strength they would both need.  She loved them both dearly and she promised herself if there was anything she could do, she would.  No matter the cost.  Just as she she knew Tom would for her.

Turning to Tom, she watched him as he drove.   He glanced over and smiled.  That wonderful, bright, reassuringly handsome and devilishly sexy smile.  She wondered if they would end up being like Simon and Jenny.  Together for so long, nobody could remember a time when they weren't.  She hoped with all of her heart they would.  There was one way to make sure.  When all this was settled, when things had calmed, she would do it. She was scared yes, but to hell with time.  To hell with what if's.

She would ask him to marry her.  Life, as she now saw, was far too short to wait.