lovely | thirteen reasons why

(39) new beginnings

So yeah, November sucked. Somehow worse than last November. Libby swears that month is cursed. Nothing else really happened that month other than Deputy Bill Standall meeting with everyone as they once again explained to him their involvement in police corruption and the covering up of a murder. Nothing new came out of it other than the knowledge that in her police briefings, Ani let it slip to the adult about spring fling. Something everyone, including her, wanted to be in the past. But it just keeps crawling back every now and again to remind Tyler that he will never outrun his past.

But it ended up being a good thing when December came around and news broke out of surfers on the coast finding duffel bags full of guns. The very guns the Clarke's were supposed to dispose of properly. Or at least that's what Libby was terrified of it being.

And then Tyler was called into the Sheriff's station. He freaked out and called Clay because that's what her baby likes to do now. So Clay picked them both up as Libby sat in the backseat with Tyler as he tried to keep it together. "I thought all this was over! Why is this happening now?"

She shook her head and held him close. "Baby, they have nothing concrete. You stick to the story and everything will be okay. I promise."

Clay remained silent as he sat in the driver's seat. "Yeah-uh-I'll just be right here for when you get back."

Libby nodded, agreeing with her brother as her boyfriend kissed her hands before letting them go and nervously walking into the station. She took a deep breath in fear for him. He was doing so well, and now he was back to living in fear. It killed her. To the point where she almost didn't notice Clay twitching madly in the front seat. "Clay? Are you okay? Are you high right now?"

He was shaking his head frantically. "No! Just get-get away! Get away from me! I didn't do anything! Stop!" He was screaming at nothing in front of him as he kept shaking and breathing heavily.

Libby unbuckled as she moved to the front seat. "Moron! Look at me!" She grabbed his balled up fist and he flinched back, turning to face her. "Clay! It's okay! It's me. Just me. There's nothing there. You're okay." The two siblings held each other for a while as Clay's breathing finally returned to normal. "Who did you see? Hannah? Jeff? Bryce?"

"Monty." He mumbled. "And I had a dream that he-that he figured out our plan and was plotting revenge."

She sighed. "Clay, he's in jail right now."

"But he's still alive!" He snapped. "He could prove his innocence and we could all be fucked! And it's all my fault!"

Libby shook her head, she couldn't let it go. "Do you get visions of people often? I've never heard of you seeing someone who's not dead."

Clay confessed. "I saw Bryce last night. But before then I haven't seen Hannah since last year. Same with Jeff. I put them at peace. But Bryce and now Monty are haunting me."

She rubbed her temple in fear. "I heard Laine was thinking about making you see your old physiatrist again. I think that's a good idea." Clay has been getting tested for depression for years now. But it's only a new phenomenon that he gets new treatment. Ever since the Jensen's learned that it wasn't actually depression and took him off his usual medication. Because it wasn't doing anything. Still, with everything that's happened, she doubts he's even given it a thought. He never thinks about himself when he really should.

But Clay wasn't given the chance to answer as Tyler hopped back in the car. So he distracted himself with his friends as usual. "Are you okay, man?"

Tyler nodded. "Y-yeah. It wasn't that bad. The gun they found were tracked back to the store and then through the tracking number they found me. I told them they were mine but someone stole them and they let me go." The way his tone of voice was coming off, Libby had a feeling that wasn't the whole story. But she'd ask him when they were alone. And she definitely wasn't letting the Clay shit go.