lovely | thirteen reasons why

(21) libby's testimony

Libby stared into the cold icy eyes of her father as his were trained on her. There was no one else in the downstairs area. No one who could buffer the intensity that was about to come out.

She sighed. "Have you listened to the tapes?"

He chuckled. "You mean the audio files converted from a list of cassette tapes you received almost six months ago that you neglected to tell anyone about? Yes, I have. Initially when I was informed of their existence I had only listened to yours. But was so intrigued by the names mentioned, I went out of order listening to them all. Starting with Tyler Down. Interesting hobbies, that boy."

She shook her head. "Hannah was a rare case in a very lonely time for him. Doesn't justify his actions, but he isn't normally like that. And he confessed to all of this during his testimony."

He smirked. "So quick to defend him. I asked Angelica what she knew of him. All she responded with was camera boy, who gets attacked a lot. Mostly by the men you formerly slept with. Quite a downgrade, Libby. But the thing is, I know why. You aren't using this boy for sex like the others, are you?"

She swallowed harshly. "I was never using anybody. Every boy knew what they were getting into with me."

His voice was stern. "Answer my question. You feel something for this boy?"

She sighed. "Yes I do."

"You love this boy?" He continued.

Again, she sighed. "Yes I do."

He chuckled. "And you were so afraid of any of us finding this out that you threatened a teenage girl with a gun at the possibility that her words could spread to your aunt and land themselves on my desk. Which would be quite a stretch to take the words of a child at face value. And then losing her last friend in such a way is one of the reasons she killed herself. That is correct?"

Libby nodded. "Yes. I have been living with her death on my hands for months now. That is why I didn't wanna lie in court. Because I've put her through enough."

"That's tough." He gritted. "Because this will not be the story you tell, because it will fall back on us. Why are you so afraid of your family finding out about your boyfriend? Answer the question honestly!"

Tears prickled her eyes. "Because you murdered Viktor's wife and children as retaliation for his actions, and he was your favorite! Because you threatened to murder anyone I loved in order to break me into submission. Because I don't want to lose him!"

Giles nodded. "And you cannot give any of those answers in court. Because then I'm fucked. Do you understand?" She nodded. "Good. Now, I know you've had it tougher than most of my children, but how much of that is my fault? I killed your mother, but I didn't kidnap you, Alden did, I didn't threaten your life, Hailey did, I didn't take you to be assaulted, Viktor did, I didn't try to kill you, Elizabeth did. I tried to give you a secure life, to make sure my child was well provided for. I took you to safety with Millicent, to a place you clearly have grown attached to more than you ever had in New York. What am I responsible for that makes you continue to disobey me?"

Libby had to take deep breaths to control her anger. "Why don't we go through each instance you mentioned. You gave the order to have my mother killed and instructed Alden to bring me to you. That was all on your order. You didn't threaten my life, but you did threaten Hailey right before she kidnapped me. What did you tell her? Because whatever it was scared her enough to take me from my room and drag me to the middle of nowhere. And I think this is the first time you've ever mentioned what Viktor did to me. Where were the consequences for him or your wife? No, instead what you did was send me away as if I was the one who needed to be punished. That one doesn't upset me anymore because the people I know and have befriended in this town quite literally saved my life. But everything that got me to this point came to be because you decided to drag me into your family when I wasn't wanted. Not even you wanted me there. I have the ask, what was the point of all this?"