Like a Wave

Chapter 53: Saying goodbye

I pulled out all our pictures from Cody and my life. Him laying on the couch holding our daughter after she was born. Our wedding album, our honeymoon pictures, the kid's birthday parties. When we first started dating, he loved to take pictures, and even tho we were only together for almost four years, we took a lot of pictures.

The police officer returned his phone to me with his wallet. In his wallet, he carried a picture of us on our wedding day and then one of all the kids. I held onto these with everything I had in me. It has been two days since I lost Cody, and the more time without seeing his beautiful face, the more it felt like something was crushing my chest.

We purchased his casket yesterday. I ordered him a dark mahogany casket with a beige interior which almost matched his suit. I had his initials monogrammed into the top inlay with a Dove flying home. It is beautiful, and we paid extra to have it finished within a few hours.

I picked his light grey suit with his light pink shirt and a silver silk tie. He always looked so handsome in that suit. We are on our way to Atlanta. Jon reserved the entire plane, and Cody is right below us.

Randy has been right beside me the entire flight, with Natalie sitting on the other side of me. Michelle and Virgil have the twins, and Jordan is with Jayden and Nathaniel. I still feel like this is a bad dream. 

When we arrive in Atlanta, the funeral will meet us and transport Cody to the funeral home. We have to go look at tombstones tomorrow. The good thing is the cemetery allows granite tombstones. 

I am going to have one made with Cody's picture engraved in it. This is hard so hard, but I have to say Virgil and Dustin have really stepped up, as have Dave and Jon. They have really helped take a lot off of me. 

All of Jordan's family, the entire lot is here, all of Cody's immediate family is here, and all of his closest friends in wrestling are here. They said they weren't leaving until after the funeral. Told Vince to keep them off the roster. My parents cried when I called and told them that Cody had passed away.

They are here with me as well. They liked Cody, and my mom adored him. He loved them as well, and he would call my dad all the time and talk to him. I wished I could go back to the day he passed away. I would have cherished our last kiss and held on a little longer. 

Instead, I am now a widow and single mother to five children. I am having to plan a funeral for a man who still had a life to live a life to live with me. The good thing is the fact we made love pretty much every night, but the day he died, we made love twice the night before and that morning. 

My sheets still have his sweat from us making love. Since the kids were on Spring break, I hadn't had a chance to change them that day. We made love until we heard them up. So, we were both drenched in sweat. We jumped in the shower and then went downstairs. Nathaniel, my big helper, had already fixed him, Jayden, and Natalie bowls of cereal, and they were sitting down eating when we came down. 

That day plays over in my head. Us making love, him washing my hair and my body in the shower, the way he wrapped his arms around me as I poured us a cup of coffee. The way he looked at me as we ate breakfast. The way he kissed me a hundred times that day. 

The way he was playing with the kids and chasing them around and passing by. He stopped, came back, kissed me, then proceeded to chase the kids. The night before the accident, the way he danced with me was as if we were making love to music as our bodies swayed together. The way he worshipped my body with kisses when we made love that night and the next morning. 

The one thing about our marriage is that there are no regrets or wished I would have done or said. I told him I loved him before he left, and we kissed. I held onto him and let him know I loved him. Cody never had to doubt my love for him. I always showed him I loved him, and I never doubted his love for me cause he always showed me he loved me.