Love from Benson and Stabler [ A Bensler Fan Fic]

25

She wrapped a soft handmade afghan around Maureen's shoulders, her fingers gently caressing her cheek as she sank back down.

"Where did you get this?" Maureen asked, her shaking fingers moving to grip the material.

"Your father passed it to me this morning. It's your mother's, and he wanted her to be with you today," Olivia replied with a gentle smile.

"I love you, Olivia. Yet I still wish my mom was here to hold my hand," Maureen sighed softly. She leaned back against the chair and closed her eyes slowly.

"She's here with you, even if you can't see her. If I know one thing about your mother, she would do anything for her children," Olivia replied. Maureen opened her eyes slowly and smiled at her father's girlfriend.

"I really miss her," Maureen whispered.

"I know, babe. Everyone does," Olivia spoke.

As the hours passed, Olivia watched Maureen dozed off between texts from her husband, father, siblings, and grandmother. At the end of her first session, Olivia walked down the hall with an arm wrapped around Maureen's waist.

"I really wish that I was just pregnant," Maureen frowned, as she glanced over at Olivia.

"What?"

"I wish I was pregnant and not dying. Even if chemo helps shrink the tumor... Even if cutting my boobs off works... There is still a chance it spreads and I'll die in the end," Maureen frowned deeply. She stopped walking and stepped in front of Olivia as tears burned her exhaustion-filled blue eyes.

"Things happen for a reason, Mo. Even if this is the scariest experience of your life, you are strong and will conquer this... One good thing is that if you choose not to get reconstruction, you will never have to wear a pinching bra again," Olivia smiled, trying to lighten up the morbid conversation.

Maureen smiled softly before stepping forward and hugging Olivia tightly.

"I'm glad we have you, Liv," Maureen whispered.

"Remember that you will always have me. No matter what."

///

Elliot unlocked his apartment door and smiled when he saw Olivia standing there.

"I didn't think that I'd see you tonight. How was Maureen's session?" Elliot asked, as he held Olivia's hand and helped her into the apartment.

"She handled it like a champ. Are you going to be able to attend some of them?" Olivia replied.

"That's the plan. Bell knows about the situation, so she'll let me take the afternoon off if I ask," Elliot answered.

Olivia settled herself onto his couch and accepted a mug of tea when offered to her. Elliot leaned close and kissed her before sitting down himself. No words were exchanged as their tea got cold between their palms.

"Mo really misses Kathy," Olivia whispered, as she sat her full mug on the coffee table. Elliot rolled his head to face her and nodded slowly.

"I do too," Elliot whispered back.

"The kids realize that I'm not trying to replace her, right? Like sometime down the line they won't rebel against our relationship because they think I overstepped?"

Elliot thought for a few long moments before sitting his own mug to the side and grabbing Olivia's hand. He ran his fingers over one of her many rings before drawing it to his lips and brushing a kiss against her knuckles.

"No one can replace Kathy. Not as their mother or my wife. Relationships change and people move forward. There may be a time when we decide to get married, but that won't change the fact I was married before and Kathy blessed me with five wonderful children. Yet we won't be picking up where Kathy and I left off," Elliot rambled. He didn't know if the words he spoke made sense or not.

"So it's okay that I keep going to her sessions with her when she asks?" Olivia asked, and Elliot nodded.

"If she finds comfort in your support, then the last thing I want to do is deny her of that."

Elliot stood and reached for Olivia. He helped her to her feet before leading her quietly to his bedroom. Once the door was shut and properly locked, Elliot turned to where Olivia's face was darkened by a shadow.

"What are we doing?" Olivia questioned.

"Are you up to making love tonight? It's been a while and I need to be with you. Truly show you how thankful I am to have you in my life," Elliot breathed, feeling almost embarrassed about how cheesy he sounded.

"Noah begged me to sleep over at a friend's house tonight, so I'm all yours," Olivia replied.

///

Clothes were stripped off and bodies were covered in kisses. Elliot laid beside Olivia, his hand cupping her full breast.

"Is your head clear now?" Olivia asked.

"Having sex with you always makes me feel more clear and relaxed," Elliot replied, his head turning to place a gentle kiss on her temple.

"Good, because I have a serious topic we need to discuss."

Elliot rolled onto his side and looked at Olivia in confusion. They already discussed Maureen's cancer and Kathy, so he didn't know what other serious topics would need to be discussed.

"Liv, do you think you're pre-" Elliot started, but stopped when Olivia groaned deeply and ran a hand down her face.

"Elliot, I'm too old for you to knock me up. I apologize if that is what you wanted," Olivia sighed.

"Like, I'd love that! But, I know it would be like something incredibly rare and-"

"El, please. Can we talk about what you said about marriage? Do you honestly think that sometime in the future you'll want to marry me and settle down more? Like move in together and raise Noah with me? We'd be a family, and I'd be a step-mom to your kids... I know a lot is happening in your life right now, but I need to know if you ever plan on proposing so I can look out for a ring in a baked potato."