No Matter What

16

I slip into an outfit quickly as Childe grabs his phone, keys and wallet. The two of us hop into the Bentley as onlookers stare in confusion. We ignore them, me trying Xiao's phone once more as Childe starts the car.

Unfortunately, as criminals ourselves, we can't necessarily call the cops since it runs the risk of being found out ourselves. The last thing we want if we find Xiao is to be taken away from him again.

I have to trust Childe's judgement. And I can easily say I trust him entirely. Though, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't still a bit worried.

"Do you remember how to get there?" I say, hand grasping at his thigh—more for my own comfort rather than his. I rub quickly, body still trembling.

"Yeah," Childe says. "It's not far from here. It was a straight shot." He pulls the car down the dirt drive and goes as fast as possible through the 5-speed road. Once we've left the campsite and entered the main street, I close my eyes and take in a few deep breaths. My heart is racing—where is my son? Dammit, where did he take my son...

I feel Childe reach down for the hand on his thigh, giving it a tight squeeze. I look over at him, but my cover is blown when the tears fall from my lashes the second my eyes open. The moment our eyes meet, he looks away again, shame written all over his face.

"It's not your fault," I say, thumb rolling over his skin. This seems to be what breaks him. He's been so stoic, so strong and confident. But suddenly, he's punched the steering wheel in front of him.

"I'm sorry..." he says through cries and wet eyes. "Fuck... I'm so sorry..."

I frown, leaning closer to him, resting my head on his shoulder that shivers beneath me. "Baby," I say gently, "it's not your fault, I promise. You couldn't have know this would happen."

"It is my fault!" he shouts through his cries, a sobbing and sniffling mess that I just hold closer best I can in this position. "I decided to be an asshole and now he comes back and takes my kid! Had I just...let it go..."

"You were protecting him," I say, now rubbing his chest. "You did the right thing. The man clearly had bad intentions regardless of what you did, Childe. It's not your fault. Please, don't feel so bad... We'll find him. I know we will. Because you're amazing, and I have so much faith in you, and I love you." I give him a soft kiss on his wet cheek, more gentle rubs to his chest.

This seems to calm him a bit, his sobbing quieting to a series of sniffles and occasional tears. "I'm... a terrible person," he nearly whispers. "I put my family in danger due to my competitive, aggressive fucking attitude, as well as dragged you into my criminal background... It just seems like I fuck up everything I touch."

"That's not true," I say. "You saved Xiao's life. I'm fully aware of what I signed up for. I signed up for an amazing, kind-hearted man who would do anything to protect his family."

I feel Childe look down at me, a single tear rolling down his cheek and landing on mine. "I love you," he says. "Thank you. Thank you for accepting me as I am."

I look up, smiling softly. "Well it isn't hard. Not for me, at least. Actually, you're just my type. I like them a little crazy." He smirks back at me. We get lost in the moment, lips inching closer, until the sound of a whaling horn sucker punches us back to reality.

"Alright, damn, it just turned green!" he shouts, a hand out the window as he pressing hard on the gas. I chuckle, and he takes a turn down the road the petrol station is on, driving straight until pulling in toward the familiar green and red pillars.

This time, he parks in the lot. I lean in to get that kiss once we stop, and he kisses me back, eyes closing, grabbing handfuls of my face. I let my tongue play around in his mouth, neck rolling back as little moans escaping the cracks. We almost forget why we're here, and I almost crawl on top of him instead. But the fog clears away pretty quickly and I'm reminded that my son is still missing and we have no time for this. I pull away, heart starting to hurt as panic creeps in again at full force.