Almos

Why

Forty-Six:

Earth

Satisfaction is what I felt when I finally saw Jeanne's face back to normal. And until now, I'm still holding her into my arms, embracing her as I continue to warm her body. She was cold as ice when we finally got into her and it was all because of Azazel, the one traps her in the ancient times.

Remembering Azazel, brought me back at the time when we're about to save Jeanne. The rage that I felt when Azazel just simply accepts Jeanne's death, made me to summon an immortal weapon which I never knew I had. Surprisingly, I can control the sword full potential that made Azazel badly wounded that weakened his hold to Jeanne, the reason why we finally escape that place before things get worse.

"She's already fine, Almos." Suddenly Ilmatar came.

I look up to her while still embracing Jeanne. "I still need to be sure, because she's still unconscious. Even his spirit remains unconscious, that keeps her away from her dream world."

Ilmatar takes a deep breath before she speaks. "I know right now you have lots of questions. Yet---"

"Not now, Ilmatar." I commanded that made her flinch, and I couldn't blame her, I'm still angry from everything that was handed to me. Things that I don't have any idea or clue to account that will help me to understand those events I and Jeanne facing. And looking through Jeanne's face, I know and I feel how much she had suffered when facing Azazel, which fueled my burning anger against him.

"If that's what you want, I'll return if you are ready."

"I won't say sorry for my sudden burst, Ilmatar. You couldn't blame me for feeling like this and I know you understand it more clearly."

"Indeed. I do understand." She answered before she silently leaves.

...

My body stiffens when I sense that there's something pinning in me. I am so sure, it's a person because it brought me heat that warms my body and my heart. As if, whoever this person was, was a part of me that I didn't remember yet I'm certain I can trust this person.

In slow, I open my eyes and met the face I'm longing for. I begin to feel at ease and relax seeing his sleeping face right in front of me. And I couldn't stop myself to intently look and memorize his face.

From his eyes with long black lashes, a nose so perfectly formed its hard to find the right word to express how perfectly it is, down to his lips that I already kiss that is hardly to forget. That brings me a burning sensation through my chest and the desire to cross the space that separates our face became too strong I don't know if I can hold on still.

I know it was wrong to take advantage of the situation that I'm in, but the longer I stare to him, the greater my desire to wake him by kissing him.

"You've better not to move, Jeanne."

Suddenly he speak without opening his eyes and shocked was immediately plastered right through my face before blushing I can feel the heat scattered all over my face. But because of his weight that embracing me, I couldn't escape away from him and all I can do is try to hide my face as much as I can.

I heard him sighed in relief before putting his forehead to my forehead that made me stop to hide.

"I'm so sorry, Jeanne." His words were full of sincerity and it even reaches my heart I couldn't let myself not to his face clearly.

I took away my forehead from his and look him straight in his eyes and maybe he senses I'll look at him, his eyes immediately opened and stare at me too.

In silence, we talk from our eyes and immediately get what he means when he said sorry. The events happened to me is what he means, although I also have a fault for what happened to me. It is because I wanted to find out the truth about the fragments of memories that I'd been seeing. The eagerness knowing the truth was too strong which exposed me from far worst danger.

"You don't need to feel at fault," Almos breaks the silence as he completely read my mind. "Because if I were in your shoes I also want to know the whole truth..."

"Why do things happen to me that I never asked God for? What sin did I commit in my past life? Why am I seeing things I don't even know it is true or not? Experience things that I don't know if it is real or not? Or even meeting someone like that man, like Asim, like Ilmatar and... someone like you. Who are you? Why do I feel that you are a part of me that I couldn't remember? Someone special yet the longer I wanted to know who you are guilt begins to build inside me, which question me why? Why do I feel this guilt towards you? What did I do wrong with you? Why?"

When I finally found my voice, I couldn't stop myself anymore. Why?

I just simply wanted to clarify the clouds that covering my mind and he was one of them. Not in a bad way, but in a guilt way. I knew to myself I've done something wrong to him however, recalling those memories will be futile since it wasn't me who hurt him. It was me from my past life and having the knowledge about the lady from the ancient times named, Fe Dougenis.

I'm so sure she did something terrible which explained this guilt I feel whenever I look into Almos face, reason for me to know the truth of the past even if it will put me in danger.

"I want to know the truth too, Jeanne." I was surprised to his answer. "And if you're fine with it. Let me accompany you."

*** ***

Jr.