Book of the Unmentioned

8: Witch

Time skip to another day :)

You did WHAT?

I'm sorry okay!

How did you manage that?

I... I actually don't know. I was in the heat of the moment! I didn't know what else to do.

Shoot her! THAT'S WHAT YOU DO! Not make her fall in love you!

I also... Nevermind...

Exodius... You better tell me.

Technically I'm engaged to her now.

WHAT?!? HOW!?!

I don't know! She just called me her fiancé and I went with it.

Why didn't you kill her?

She called down her Hive to "celebrate."

What the hell Exodius! I send you to do one simple ass thing, kill a Hive witch, and this is what you do!

I'm sorry...

Ughhh... Sometimes I wonder why...

I'll just go...

No! You're not going anywhere. I'm taking you with me to murder her.

You seem really upset. I kinda don't want to make you more mad.

Dude, this is funny as hell to me. I'm just confused as to how one who mindlessly slaughters in strikes can fail an assassination mission.

Sometimes I wonder too...

OH MY GOD! IDEA!

What?

You're marrying her. That's it. I don't care.

What? No.

Hey, you screwed this up, and we're not canceling the engagement.

But what if I found another?

That's cute. Is it another witch? No no, it's a Fallen Captain! The possibilities are endless! And so is my laughter!

Actually, she's not an enemy.

Imagine you, with a Hive witch! That's just- Say what now?

This seems like a horrible time for this, but I did mention it.

I'm a little confused... What's going on again?

Man, this is harder than I thought...

Exodius?

You know how we've, y'know, been with each other for a while?

Yes...

So, would you, uh, would you?

Would I what?

You chose a bad day to be clueless... Will you...

Wait, you're on one knee, and you seem very... Oh... My.  .  .

Will you m-

Yes! Of course I would!

Really?

Yup!

Oh. Well I guess this day just got better.

It surely did.

Do I still have to marry the witch?

Yes.

Well shit. My plan didn't work.

That's because you still have to pay for your mistakes. However, once it is all said and done, we can...

Talk more about what just happened?

Precisely.

Well then, would you be so kind as to get off of me so we can leave?

What if I like it here?

Don't you want to watch me be humiliated?

You have a good point.

In any other circumstance, I would have let you stay there...

Oh?

Yeah.

I'll keep that in mind.

Interesting...

Anyways! C'mon, you've got a wedding to attend!

Time to esca- HEY! DON'T DRAG ME!

Too late.