A Bridge Over Troubled Waters

A chapter titled: Untitled Part 42

[Note: I edited the first part of this "chapter" on 12/23/2023 before I realized that there was a second part that had a chronological relevance.  Translation: Oops?

[However, I left the "more important, second part" unchanged.  Besides, notations concerning a fictional character (in this case Ragnar Thorson) are less critical to my reasons for writing this "autobiography" in the first place.

[Macbeth Raymondovich, 23 December 2023.]

Like some artists and some poets, some fiction writers put a bit of themselves into their stories, and even into their characters.

Since I'm: 1) A professional crazy person.  2) A hieroglyphic illiterate aardvark.  3) A constipated were-chihuahua.  4) A monk who is also a monkey's uncle.  And 5) the world's — worst — political candidate since...

(Drumroll, please.)

•  Ivan the Terrible's second cousin's former "Royal Nose Hair Trimmer" ... ran for the noble position of Trans-Siberian Potato Tsar. 

(A highly coveted position, to be sure.  Although nobody knows why...)

•  It may have had something to do with the production of vodka.

Unfortunately, the second cousin's nephew drank all of the evidence.  (Yes, fight fans: yet another case of nepotism gone horribly wrong!)

Any-who...

You'd expect all of my fictional characters to be raving lunatics.  Or at least overly polite (and even more politically correct) lunatics.  The common denominator is that you'd expect all of my characters to have R.F.S.s [Rabid Flying Squirrels] infesting their brainpans.

•  Yes, yes: I know.  I'm a horrible person.  We've already established that fact.

But, as somebody used to say, the proof is in the pudding.

~•~

Superhero character study #1: Ragnar Thorson

*

Myostatin is a remarkable substance in that it seems to regulate how big at least skeletal muscles grow.  So, a myostatin null, adolescent boy might look like a bodybuilder who eats steroid fueled weightlifters for breakfast.

Now, add a twist on the stereotype of a "dumb blonde" by giving him a superior memory that offsets his obvious lack of academic intellect.  Which in no way negates the fact that he's quite observant and empathetic.

There are a few things "iffy" about this character:

A)  There are a limited number of humans on which to base such a physiology on.

B)  Placing any other physical details limits that reference pool even further.

Thing is, when dealing with rare traits, an author, or an artist, must be ... careful.

Granted, comicbooks abound with hyper-muscular dudes — who are often depicted as having an insanely huge body ... topped by a ridiculously tiny head.

Given the above points, how can I set Ragnar Thorson apart both visually and conceptually?

Options:

A) heterochromia: different eye colors.

B) some degree of albinism.  [Yes, this is possible.]

C) Down's syndrome.

D) hypertrichosis [obvious, and extreme, hairiness — which, in some cases, can have collateral impacts.]

E) give him some other obvious congenital defect and/or mutation.  [Some possibilities could be surgically mitigated.  Some other possibilities?  No.]

F) make him unusually tall or short, stout or thin.

G) "accidents?" can happen.  [I've yet to fill in a lot of his earlier history.]

****

I interrupt this chapter on creative reflection with something that's both immediate and autobiographical.

****

Monday, 20 November 2023

Something happened at my church this last Sunday, November 19, 2023.  And I'm writing about it at 20+ minutes past midnight, local time.  Basically, I received a commendation from my pastor — and I'm feeling noxious about it right now.

Firstly, I didn't ask for it, which (I've been told) is a good thing.  Nor did I expect it.  (For starters, I was maybe 12 or 14 minutes late.  And I'm often late.

(And I showed up in the clothing that I'd slept in ... which, truth be told, is a matter of no great consequence to me.  But it might be to somebody else, which is why I'm mentioning it.  Thing is, I usually don't go to church to be praised by others either openly or secretly.  Even so, church is 1 of my major social networks.  But, in appearance, I at least don't want to be overly offensive.)

Secondly, it was for nothing that I considered of a quality that warranted any open praise.

Third, it was not only in front of the congregation, but it was "broadcasted?" live to people online — and I have no idea who was watching.

My primary points being:

1)  I don't feel worthy of the commendation.

-and-

2)  I prefer to let my service to be its own reward.

[If you want to upset me, then call me a good man.  If you want to hurt me, then call me righteous.  Only God is good.  I mean that with all sincerity at this precise moment.]

Blood pressure not long ago: 140 over 81, if I recall properly.  That's not happy news.  Coming to terms with how sick that I feel right now is actually rather important.  I'm closer to having an anxiety attack than I've been for a significant amount of time.

Being fair, there's more pricking my guilty conscience than the commendation.

A)  In the USA, the Thanksgiving Day holiday is drawing nigh ... and I still haven't called my birth family to see what their plans are.  Even more problematic, I've invited a good friend of mine ... even though I've no idea if she'd be welcome.

B)  Healthcare, particularly as we age, is a common concern ... although I've already set a lot in motion on that front.  This I can more easily attain peace of mind about.  Besides, God is good.

It's been stated that:

•  You only know that God is all you really need — when God is all that you really have.

C)  It's my more ingrained hypocrisies that trouble me.  Which, I confess, are the primary sources of my unease.  Secondary, then, is my not wanting to be praised for any acts of service.

Hence, being publicly called out has upset me.

~•~

Given all the insanity that's going on in the world right now, how oddly ridiculous this "problem" may seem to billions of people.

Huh.  While that realization isn't at all comforting, it's beginning to put things into perspective.