The Words That Hurt Me

Forty-Eight: What do you want from me?

What Mikey would like to know is why literally everyone decided to go up to the roof at that particular moment. 

"Mikey, you're dating Leatherhead? Since when?" Leo asked, approaching Mikey.

"Other me likes boys?" Mike, just as confused, asked.

"Same," Leon said, trying to give Mikey an encouraging smile. His brothers looked at him.

"Leo, you like boys?" Raphie asked, no longer interested in Mikey at all.

"Uh, yeah? I already told you that," Leon responded, only to be met with confused looks, "I told y'all, right?"

Goo covered their mouth and gestured at Mondo.

"Guys, I think this is an inside conversation," They said, ushering the Other turtles back into the building.

"Didn't I tell you guys!?" 

Goo gave Mikey a final nod, signing to him: [Breathe]

The rooftop was silent. Mikey forced himself to breathe slowly, the sound echoing in his ears. His brothers were tense, just staring at Mikey. Leo cleared his throat.

"Mikey, um, can I ask how long you two have been dating?" Leo tempted a step forward, "This happened last night didn't it?"

"Uh, no," Mikey mumbled, looking away, "It's been, like, a month,"

"A month!?" Raph asked, "And you didn't say anything?"

"A lot happened!" Mikey blurted, "S-so much happened so fast that I... I forgot to tell you,"

"Forgot to tell us?" Raph asked incredulously, "You 'forget' to say things an awful lot, don't you? Why? Why do you refuse to talk to us? Do you not trust us or something?"

"Raph!" Leo warned. 

The two held a tense gaze. Mikey's heart started racing, making his palms sweaty and his tongue feel heavy. He closed his eyes, all sorts of thoughts running through his mind.

Then he felt a small hand on his shoulder.

'No time will feel like the right time,' A familiar voice whispered to him, 'The only time you have is now,'

Mikey took a final breath, opening his eyes.

"You know!" Mikey blurted, gaining everyone's attention, "You guys can be really hard to talk to sometimes!"

Everyone was looking at him, which made his nerves flair, but he pressed forward anyway.

"Things h-haven't been okay for a long time, and you need to stop acting like it! It feels like you guys are just trying to ignore it," Mikey stuttered, "Ever since we, we lost Splinter, it felt like we lost our family. We haven't talked for two years! Unless it's you calling me an idiot."

Mikey took a breath.

"You guys are so-so disconnected, it's like you're not even there! Do you know how lonely that feels?" Mikey squeezed his eyes shut, "I have all these nightmares and flashbacks and I get so scared going through portals and-"

In the next moment, Mikey was being crushed in an embrace. Donny, who had been silent up until then, had swiftly pulled his brother into his arms, with no intention of letting go anytime soon.

"Mikey- I'm sorry," Donny sniffled, "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you, I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't come to me-" 

Donny's voice cracked and he looked away to wipe his eyes. 

"You're my little brother," He cried, looking into his eyes, "All I've ever wanted to do is protect you, but all I did was push you away. I really am a failure of a brother-"