Master Skywalker - Anakin x yn

10. I can't give up

Many days, weeks, hours are spent thinking about him. We trained together every day, but we kept our relationship strictly professional, I stopped calling him Anakin and started calling him Master again, it felt like the right thing to do even if it hurts me a lot...I don't really know how he feels about this situation, it's clear we're both unhappy, but in the end it was my choice. I did it for him, I couldn't bear it if someone found out about us and we were kicked out of the Jedi Order...if it was only my future at stake I would have taken the risk...but I can't let him give up what he has worked for all his life just for me.

One Sunday afternoon she is sitting among the daisies, in the grass in the shade near a tree. She is relaxing, thinking about Anakin even though she does not want to admit it.

. . .

Anakin is walking through the temple, alone.

Too many weeks have passed since I...I had to let her go...

But I simply still can't believe that it has happened. I should be getting over her now, at least.

Or...shouldn't I? No, no, I can't do this...

He continues on, deep in thought.

No...

She...she did this for me...and yet I cannot forget her now. I...am I really willing to let her go?

No...I simply cannot. No...

"I refuse now...," Anakin whispers.

I'm going back, I must find her.

I cannot give up now...

He turns back and begins walking in the gardens

He sees her

She's so beautiful...

He walks towards her

I cannot be without her now...I'm going to show her that she doesn't need to worry about me, about the Jedi, about anyone else now. I can take care of all the secrets, all the risks that comes with a relationship. I'm doing it for her, I'm doing it for us.

She notices him but she doesn't say anything, he approaches her and sits next to her in the grass

Anakin smiles at her now, but it's a forced smile.

She does not wish to see me. I'm going to have to be persistent in order to win her heart back now.

"yn...I need to tell you something"

Just give in now...please, yn, don't do this to us.

How can I even live without her now? It's impossible...I can't even dream of it.

"Master, is it about the training?"

"of course not, dear," Anakin replies.

My love...you cannot keep acting like this now. I cannot keep lying to you now. I...I need to tell you something now, dear.

"I...I must tell you something now, so please listen to me."

I must win back her trust again, for this to all work...

"Master...it's not about what we talked about weeks ago, right?"

"it...it's actually about that."

She's guessed what I have to say now. I...I have to be blunt with her.

"yn, we cannot keep lying to each other any longer. I...I cannot accept things the way they are. I cannot...cannot simply keep working together as if nothing never happened."