One Direction Mental Health One Shots

It wasn't until Break // N.H

Hey guys sorry for the long wait, also sorry for the ending this was done years ago now 

xx

tw

xx

Everyone thinks self harm is attention seeking but in fact they are wrong.

Self harm is something you do to feel again.

NIALL'S POINT OF VIEW

I don't fully know when I started self-harming but I know it was after we started the band.

When I started getting hate.

"Ni, we have 10 minutes until the show," Liam smiled as I nodded.

"I'm just going to the toilet, guys," I said before leaving and going to the toilets.

"Time to feel something," I smiled to myself as I locked the door and got my kit out.

TW - I grabbed the blade and pressed it down hard on my skin before slicing it across my pale, fragile arms.

I finally felt the numbness disappear and I could feel the sensation of my skin opening and bleeding out.

"Niall, Ni, you okay buddy?" Zayn asked as I jumped not realising I had gone deeper than normal.

"Yeah?" I croaked out, as I quickly put the blade away.

TWF "You sure buddy? Zayn questioned before I quickly cleaned and bandaged my arm.

"Yeah, just a dodgy stomach," I lied while putting everything away and cleaning the floor before flushing the toilet and putting my arm in my long sleeve top and jumper.

"We're due on stage in 2 minutes," Zayn spoke as I made sure I had my kit before opening the door.

"Shit baby, you've been crying?" Zayn hugged me.

When did I start crying?

I thought.

"Let's go see the boys babe," Zayn told me before we walked to the others who was by the stage.

"Finally, Ni, woah you ok?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, it's nothing, let's go do this." I smiled before we all ran on stage.

"Hello Singapore, How are we all?" I questioned as the fan's screamed.

We were nearly finished the concert when I started feeling blood dripping down my arm and my face going paler.

"I need to get off stage now," I thought to myself.

"Babe, you okay?" Liam asked as I shook my head.

"Li, I've got to get off stage now," I told him as he nodded before leading me backstage.

"Lads, you need to go back up there," Paul sighed.

"No, something is wrong with Niall," Liam replied as I started panicking. I needed to go to the bathroom, and sort myself out before the lads found out.

"Go back on stage, Liam, you have 10 minutes left," Paul told Liam.

"Toilet," I choked out before running away from Liam and Paul and went to the toilet and locked the door.

Shit.

I thought as I took my jumper and top off, seeing blood all up my arm.

"Fuck," I thought as I yanked the bandage off finally noticing I had cut deeper than normal.

"Idiot," I shouted grabbing tissue and falling on the floor by the door,

"Ni, buddy, are you ok in there?" Paul asked as I was crying.

"Yeah," I said, obviously not sounding convincing.

"Do you want the boys?" Paul asked as I took the tissue off, only for it to start bleeding more.

"Shite," I shouted, forgetting Paul was outside as it had gone silent."

"Ni, you ok?" Paul asked again.

"Y-yeah," I stuttered, trying to stop the bleeding, but it wasn't working, making me panic.

"The boys are coming now, Ni," Paul's voice sounded worried but I was too busy panicking fully now.

"Ni, keep talking to me," Paul said.

"I can't breathe," I choked out, pretty much in a full blown panic attack now.

"Shit, oh thank god you're all here now," Paul said.

"Ni, baby, can you open the door?" someone asked.

"No," I cried before moving myself a bit.

"Ni, move out the way," Paul spoke before I moved away from the door, but still hiding myself.

Next thing I knew the door opened and the lads came running over.

"Ni, come here," Harry said, but I shook my head.

"Ni-bear, can we see your beautiful face?" Liam asked as I shook my head.

"Calm down, buddy," Louis spoke softly but I couldn't then the next thing I knew I was being pulled into somebody's lap.

"No, no, no," I cried trying to move but they held me closer.

"Baby, calm down," Zayn softly rubbed my back as I calmed down.

"Ni, love, what's happened?" Louis questioned as I looked over Zayn's shoulder, realising they could only see my face unlike Zayn.

"Shit," I heard Zayn speak so I looked at him and noticed he was looking at my arms.

"Liam, go and get Paul now, Louis and Harry medical kit is needed now," Zayn sternly told them as they did what they were told.

Leaving just Zayn and I.

"Baby, I'm going to take the tissue off so I can see it properly, can you tell me why?" Zayn asked as I nodded.

"The fans have been sending hate and I just - ow - fell into this deep dark hole," I cried as Zayn finally took the tissue off.

"What do you need buddy?" Paul asked as Liam and him walked in while I hid my face in Zayn's shirt.

"Can you call the doctor to meet us on the bus?" Zayn asked as he turned us, making them both gasp.

"Yeah straight on it, you sure no hospital?" Paul questioned as I shook my head.

"No, he won't go," Zayn sighed before I heard more gasping.

"Thanks lads, baby this might hurt," Zayn spoke before I felt something cold hit my cuts and sting.

"Babe, why didn't you tell us?" Louis asked as I shrugged.

"All done baby, let's go on the bus and wait for the doctor, can you walk?" Liam asked as I shook my head.

"Jumper," I whispered as I looked at Zayn.

"No, baby, it's all dirty," He told me as we stood up before he picked me up and carried me to the bus.

Niall ended up going to hospital for stitches.

He was now on the mend and seeing a therapist weekly.