Killer Kings

Chapter 13: One Bitch, Two Bitch, Three Bitch, Four Bitch, Five Bitches Dead

4 years ago

Pain, suffering, sadness, darkness, loneliness. None of those things should mean anything to me, a 13-year-old girl who has her whole life ahead of her. At least, that's what the schoolteachers go on about in class. That we're at the point in our lives to do things that matter, that are vital to our growth and survival.

So, that's what I'm doing. I'm surviving by taking matters into my own hands because my mother won't, and my father's never going to stop. Mother couldn't care less about her daughter being forced to...no, I can't say it. I won't. If I say it, that makes me weak, and I will never be weak like this again.

I stand in the kitchen doorway, staring at the man that's passed out on the couch. The man that had once told me that he'd protect me from all the monsters in the world. The man that had once been my best friend even if he made mother cry so much that she left me alone.

I stare at the man that became the monsters that I had feared so much. The man that hurts my mother so much that she felt the need to abandon me with him. She knows I look just like her, but she left me to my fate, not caring about me at all. I hate her for that, but I hate the man in front of me far more than anyone I've ever known.

Making sure that he's well on his way to dream land, I walk back into my kitchen. I'd read several murder mystery books over the last several weeks, studying them to the best of my knowledge. I wanted to find a way out, any way out, and one that didn't involve me dying.

That can wait until after I no longer have to creep around my own home, looking over my own shoulder ever few seconds to make sure I'm not about to be snatched up by the monster.

It took me a while, but I learned all the tricks and steps I needed to take. I learned everything I could about what I needed to do, how I needed to do it, and what I was going to do later on to ensure that nothing happened to me again.

I grab the popcorn off the table, ripping the plastic and cardboard off in order to cook it. My father loves popcorn, so this wouldn't seem out of character for him in case the firefighters did find the cause. My father's drinking problem is well known, so him passing out drunk isn't out of the normal for him either. This will all look like a simple accident, and I can't help the little giddy giggle that slips from my lips into the quiet.

Everyone will think it's an accident, but I'll know the truth. I'll know that I'm the reason I survived this nightmare. I'll know every detail, and I won't ever forget that I can survive, that I can win, that I can make it out alive no matter what comes next.

I turn the stove on, all the way up on high, and set the popcorn on the stove. I run over to the fridge and grab a few bottles of the alcohol my father likes to drink so much. I quietly and carefully walk back over to the stove, setting the bottles around the kitchen as I go. I turn on the rest of the burners up on high.

Once that's done, I grab my jacket and run like hell out the door. I race my way down the street, ignoring the way my legs shake with the effort, my pain ridden body protesting, and how my heart races. My heart's going so fast that I think it's going to fall out of my chest.

I can't believe I just did that, that I'm actually doing this. I can't believe that I'm going to be the cause. Does this make me as bad as he is? Will this make me a monster?

Part of me screams at me that I'm not a monster, that I'm just a broken girl that took surviving into my own hands. The other part screams that I am a monster, but only because he made me into one. 

That he's the reason that I'm the way I am now.

When I get to the park, I slow down to make myself look less suspicious. I walk through the park, my heart racing as my blood rushes all around. I smile and wave at the few adults that I know, and I play with a few kids here and there. I need to make myself known, show them that I was here, that I didn't just cause my house to go up in flames.