My Favorite Sin [Shin Hati x reader]

Chapter 8: Going Home

Time stopped passing for me. For the others it passed way to fast and yet they chose to move slowly. I heard their plan but it never really reached me. Stopping Thrawn and going home was their goal. But how to define home? For some it's a place, for some a person, for others it's a feeling or something connected to their past.

I always used to believe my home is my family but when they died on mandalore everything changed. My sister was the only thing that kept me going but she started to change too.
Part of me was hoping that my sister saw me as the most important person in her life like she used to be for me all the time. The way she watched Ezra told me differently. I didn't know what exactly was between them and if they were really just like siblings. But I knew that I was second to him if Ahsoka included I might even have been third. To be hones I felt jealous. I have never been the most important person for anyone and the realisation hurt more than I'd like to admit.

It was worse to be lonely around people than being truly alone. Their happiness about being reunited should make me feel happy too but they didn't care if I was there and everytime I closed my eyes I longed to be somewhere else. Shin was hunting me. She was everywhere but I couldn't reach her. When I touched my saber I was brought back to our first fight. I still felt the kiss she gave me. I saw her shadow in the distance. I heard her whispering my name but when I turned around she wasn't there. Our connection was still there but she was blocking me out. As if she shut a door I just wanted to tear down.

Ahsoka seemed to be disappointed. I caught her looking at me sometimes but she didn't talk to me. My sister was too busy chatting with Ezra to care about me and maybe it was better this way. She needn't know about my feelings.

Once Ezra finished building his lightsaber out of the many parts that were stored on the shuttle we were ready to stop Thrawn. It felt like a feverdream. I was tired all the time and couldn't tell how long we've been here for.

When we wanted to fly to Thrawns tower two tie-fighters flew towards us and started shooting. Since our shields were already in a bad state the shuttle started sinking down in the back. Ahsoka and Ezra ran outside to stop the shuttle from crashing down on our little green rock friends. Sabine, Huyang and I stayed inside trying to fix it.

Sabine waited for the right moment to use a power burst and fly forward hitting both tie-fighters at once letting them explode. The little power didn't last long and only a short distance further we landed harshly on the ground. We quickly got out and watched Ahsoka rush towards us.

After inspecting it shortly Huyang stated that the ship won't be able to fly in time to stop Thrawn and his weird witches. Ahsoka decided that we shouldn't let this stop us and we mounted our loth-wolves. We would still be slower but maybe just fast enough. Ezra sat behind Sabine and Ahsoka and I both had our own wolves. I didn't ask her where she got hers from but a feeling told me she stole it from Baylan Skoll.

It didn't take us long to see the tower and Thrawns star destroyer. We rode as fast as possible but once we came closer the enemy ship started shooting at us. We tried to not let it slow us down and dodged their attac. The entrance was closed and we had to use the force to open the door. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't feel it. Sabine told me the same thing once but I knew she got closer to it. That I couldn't use it wasn't that bad. But once I met Shin I started feeling the force in a way that I couldn't explain.

The door opened right in time for us to enter and closed almost too fast. If we were just a little slower it would have smashed us. The relief was only of short term. A group of nighttroopers was already waiting for our arrival and started attacking immediatly. The four of us ignited our saber to block their deadly shots.

Sabine changed to her blasters and we cleared our way quickly. The troopers dropped dead everywhere and after taking a short moment to breathe we continued going forward and walking up the stairs. We were only a few steps up when a shiver run down my spine and weird noises sounded from the dead bodies. All of us turned around and watched with horror how they started moving again. The shots Sabine fired at them didn't seem to bother them. They slowed for a moment and kept on coming at us. We walked backwards to keep facing the zombies.