In My Dreams - Bill Kaulitz Story

43. The conversation with Tom

The door creaked open, and we saw Tom cautiously entering. He seemed surprised to find Bas with me. "Oh, sorry if I'm interrupting," said Tom.
I smiled and shook my head. "No, not at all. Bas was just curious about something we were talking about. No problem."
Tom nodded understandingly and then looked at Bas, asking, "Bas, could you leave me alone with Elise for a moment? We have some band matters to discuss."
When Tom asked if we could be alone, Bas looked at both of us with a playful grin. "Can I trust you two alone?" he asked with a wink.
I looked at Bas, and suddenly, the light seemed to go on in his head again. "Ooooh!" he began to exclaim, realizing that it was the Elise from the other world who had slept with Tom. Laughing, Bas walked out of our dressing room and closed the door behind him.
I looked at Tom, with a slight blush on my cheeks. Now that we were alone, I was curious about what Tom wanted to discuss.
Tom casually leaned against a table in the dressing room and chuckled lightly. "Wow, you and Bas seem to get along well, huh?" His remark carried a hint of mild jealousy, but I decided not to pay much attention to it. Instead, curious about his intentions, I asked what he wanted to discuss. Tom's expression changed, and he seemed genuinely interested as he asked, "I actually came to check if everything is okay with you. You seemed a bit distant on the way here. Everything alright?" His eyes searched mine, and I felt a bit nervous under his intense gaze.
I smiled cautiously and replied, "I'm okay, Tom. Thanks for asking." My response was reserved because I wasn't sure how much I could tell Tom about my situation.
Tom stared at me intently, and his words made me a bit nervous. "Elise, I'm not blind. I saw that you had cried when you came back with Bill. Is it because of our night that you're now having a fight with Bill?"
I looked at Tom in shock. "No, no, it has nothing to do with you, Tom. We're not fighting. It's just... something from my past."
Tom seemed momentarily disappointed with my response. He looked at the ground and fidgeted with his feet for a moment. Then he looked at me again and smiled, but it was clear that something was bothering him. "Okay, Elise. If you ever feel like talking, you know where to find me."
I felt guilty for making Tom feel this way. Normally, I would walk away in this situation, but I decided to handle it differently. I sat in front of Tom and took his hands. His gaze briefly avoided mine, but eventually, he looked me straight in the eyes.
"Tom," I began hesitantly while holding his hands, "do you maybe still have feelings for me?" The words trembled a bit, but I wanted to know how he felt.
Tom looked deep into my eyes and sighed. "Elise," he started hesitantly, "I still have feelings for you since our night. It's hard for me to let go of that, even though I know it's wrong and I don't want to hurt Bill." He rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand as he spoke. "I'm jealous of the love you and Bill share. I want to find something, something special, like you two have." Tom looked at me, and I could see the sincerity in his eyes.
Tom sighed deeply and continued, "It even seems like Bill has become even more in love with you since we had sex. I'm genuinely happy for him, but it hurts, Elise. It hurts so much to see how happy he is with you." He looked at the ground, and I saw regret in his eyes. "I know I need to let go of my feelings, but it's damn hard."
I looked Tom in the eyes and said with a sincere smile, "Tom, I truly believe that you'll meet someone who genuinely loves you, without all this drama. Someone with whom you'll have a great relationship, and Bill will be incredibly happy for you too." I placed my hand on his shoulder and continued, "You should know that you're very special to me too, Tom, but in a different way. You'll forever be in my heart as a good friend, and I don't want our friendship to change."
Tom looked me straight in the eyes, and I could see the pain in his gaze as he asked the question. "Elise, do you really think I'll ever meet someone?" He seemed unsure and in need of reassurance. His voice trembled a bit as he spoke, and I saw his eyes glistening with sadness.
I took his hands and smiled at him. "Yes, Tom, I absolutely believe that," I replied with conviction. "You're a wonderful person, and someone out there is waiting for you, someone who will love you just as much as you'll love her. And when that happens, you'll realize that it was worth the wait." While talking to Tom, I thought about the relationship between Heidi Klum and Tom in my world. It seemed to me that they were very happy together, and I was glad that Tom had found someone with whom he could share that happiness. Moreover, I couldn't help but notice how well Bill and Heidi got along, forming a harmonious group as friends.
Tom's eyes sparkled with genuine gratitude as he hugged me. He held me tightly, and I felt his heartbeat against mine. His smile was warm and sincere, and I could see that he was genuinely pleased with our candid conversation. "You have no idea how much this means to me," he said.
While Tom and I embraced, the door of the dressing room gently opened, and there stood Bill, looking at us with raised eyebrows, asking, "What's going on here?"