Malik and Jade

Chapter 5 (Jade): Another Week

Copyright © 2024 by GroveltoHEA

Malik strode into the infant-parent room confidently, his arrogance that he always wore an unconscious accessory. His confidence had been a major attraction to me when we'd met; I was confident to a point, but in a much quieter way and still struggled with second guessing myself. Malik made decisions swiftly and without hesitation.

He had a bouquet of flowers in one hand, a small gift bag dangling from one finger, and in his other hand, he had a brown bag with our favorite restaurant's logo on it. It was the same restaurant where we'd had our first date. If he was trying to make a point, it wasn't a good one. It just reminded me of his deceit, of a time I'd fallen so willingly and eagerly under his spell, not knowing. Not knowing the important things.

"Where would you like these?" he asked. "I thought we could celebrate Nour's last night in the hospital together."

Why? Was Brooklyn unable to see you because she was too busy mourning what could have been?

I pointed at a place just behind him and his gaze followed the direction my finger was indicating. His mouth tightened when he saw the trash can, and, without a word, he ignored me and set his unwanted gifts on top of the counter by the mini-fridge.

Don't ask if you don't want the answer.

"Malik, to be honest -- feel free to Google what that means, if necessary -- you've already ruined every single moment for me since Nour's birth, from the first time I saw him through all the days between then and now."

No getting emotional, Jade. Get through this and then be done with him.

"Once I knew he was coming so early, I had to hold on to the image of us seeing our baby boy together. It gave me strength and courage. But then there you were, comforting your colleague, blatantly cuddling together in the hospital hallway in front of everyone and talking about your might-have-beens and humiliating me, and I had to walk into the NICU alone, and cry as I looked at my beautiful boy by myself because of you. So unless you're determined to ensure that your contempt for me ruins even this special time, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me just have tonight to enjoy being alone with my son."

"Our son, Jade. I'm sor--"

"Don't you dare try to apologize," I seethed. "You don't deserve to. I needed you, Malik. Your wife was a mess, but you were with her and you taught me to never need you again."

"Jade, no, no. Please. It's not like that at all. I don't feel any contempt whatsoever --" he tried again but I was channeling some anger-beast part of me I wasn't familiar with, and my vicious look of incredulity stopped him from pursuing that line of thought before he tried a third time.

"I won't mention...anything. Let's just enjoy being alone together with our son for the first time. Call a truce."

I was sure he'd love to call a truce. What Malik actually meant was he wanted me to cease what he viewed as my hostility. No doubt I was hostile, but it was a mask for the utter devastation I felt, a way to keep the pain frozen inside of me like a giant block of ice that I couldn't allow to melt. If I were to thaw the least little bit, I'd have no hope of getting through each day without collapsing and curling into a ball of wreckage. Nour first, last and in between.

"As long as the truce involves not speaking to each other, I agree. Since you're incapable of giving me anything else, silence shouldn't be hard for you to give me. After all, the words I wanted from you were given to someone else, which means you have no words I want to hear."

His normally stoic face was now strained, conflicted, desolate. He wanted to argue the point, explain his side, make his case, that much was clear, but what I was asking for was so little, really.