Your the only one I've ever loved

Chapter 17

A month has passed and I still won't speak to Noah. One thing I know is, I won't break his and Theo's friendship. This is between me and him.

My heart aches for him. I have been in such a depressive mood, I'm heartbroken.

The football games aren't going good. He is forever being sat on the bench because of his anger towards other players. Either that or he can't keep focus on the game. He has finally received the message that I don't want to speak to him.

I am currently sat at one of the football games and the team is coming over for an emergency meeting after, they can't keep losing. Lottie is cheering along side me and my mum.

Noah is about to get into another fight but Theo intervenes. I watch as he sits him out again. "Maya, why is Noah so angry?" Lottie puzzles. I look down at her and shrug.

"I'm not sure Lottie." I sigh. She doesn't know that we broke up. I don't have the heart to tell her.

My phone buzzes and I pick it up. It's another message from Sophia, they have been constant for the past month. They have been that extreme that I have stopped eating. I'm damaging myself because she is in my head 24/7.

I can't get her out. It's so hard battling her everyday. My mum is so concerned after all the weight I've dropped. I wasn't even that big to start off with, just bigger then the majority. Thick thighs have gone. Little pouch has gone. Yet I'm not happy.

My thoughts are disrupted when we score a touchdown. The crowd goes crazy and before we know it, the game has finished. We finally have a win. Family relatives and friends scramble onto the pitch to celebrate with the team.

"Well done!" My mum squeals hugging Theo tightly. "You did good." I smile. Lottie is so excited and jumping around. She soon walks off to Noah who is sat on the bench. "Hi." She smiles.

I watch from a distance, "Hi Lottie." Noah sighs. "Why aren't you as good anymore?" She puzzles. Noah can't give her an answer but instead tears up. Lottie reaches out to give him a hug but he declines.

He kisses her forehead and leaves the pitch. Everything in me wants to follow him but I refuse to fall into a trap. I stay with the rest of the football team and soon enough they are all back at ours.

"Where's Noah?" Theo questions the entire team. They have no idea of his whereabouts.

Half way through the meeting, dinner is ready and waiting. The football team pour out of the front room and my heart breaks when I don't see Noah.

We all sit round the table and I sit and scroll on my phone. "So what are the plans for tomorrow?" Miles questions Theo. Theo shrugs, his mood is completely off. "Noah will be fine, he'll be in touch." I try to reassure him.

Theo nods, "we could go out tomorrow night." I feel my anxiety kicking in. What if he gets stabbed again. It's Halloween tomorrow, the anniversary of Ellie's death. I'm dreading it.

I hear the front door open. We all stop and I get up from my seat. "Sit down." Theo hushes as he grows protective. I see the face of the man who walked through the door and recognise it instantly.

It's Noah. I sigh, "it's Noah." Theo looks somewhat relieved until we hear something fall. "Shit." I hear Noah curse, his voice sounds different.

I walk out of the dining room and into the hallway. His dilated pupils meet my lost eyes. "Maya." He sighs painfully. "Are you drunk?" I puzzle frowning my eyebrows.

He shrugs and I roll my eyes. "Why aren't you eating?" He says walking towards me. I stand my ground and swallow the hard lump in my throat, "that's got nothing to do with you."