ataraxia, lorenzo berkshire

"forty seven"

Valentina wished she could've taken more time to mentally prepare herself as she stood timidly outside of Saskia's dorm.

She found herself hesitant - she loathed herself for this, it was cowardly of her - despite speaking in unsolicited confidence to Xander when it came to assisting Lorenzo. 

Maybe an extra few paces in the common room would've helped.

Maybe a shot or two? Or a cigarette.

Maybe three shots.

And three cigarettes.

Possibly some weed, too.

"Fuck," She shook her head vigorously, as if by doing so it'd rid the droplets of nauseating anxiety that accumulated all over her body like boils upon her skin - as if she were a mutt shaking its fur to rid itself of the rainwater.

Surprise, seizing like a fish out of water changed nothing about how she felt.

"You're such a fucking wet-wipe, fuck!" She whispered aggressively beneath her breath towards herself - her hands developing an unhelpful tremor as they shuddered, hovering uncertainly in a knocking position, millimetres away from the solid oak door.

"Erm, Val? Is everything alright?," Magnora asked concernedly as she appeared from around the corner - stopping in her tracks.

She appeared to be holding a small box in her grasp, which, as Valentina became more trained on her face, she shyly tucked into her robe pocket.

"I'm fine, you?," Valentina replied shakily, dropping her hand from it's position quickly and enveloping it behind her back as she turned to face the girl.

"What're you doing outside of Saskia's dorm?,"

"Oh, I-,"

Thankfully, the to-be cumbersome conversation was ceased by the sound of one of the neighbouring doors clicking open - a deep bellow emerging from the aged wooden door as it was pushed open.

A figure had become apparent from behind the slab of wood, and it was one Val knew all too well.

"Mattheo?," Valentina cocked her head sideways, "What are you doing here? This is the girls' corridor."

Usually she wouldn't have bothered asking such a stupid question - it was common knowledge that Mattheo, among others she knew - were like subway rats to the girls' dormitories.

The infesting pests they were, spreading their diseases and sticking their tails where they shouldn't.

However, it was one o'clock in the afternoon.

First period was in motion until one thirty, and it was exam season.

Therefore, it had become less common for students to fuck like breeding rabbits this early in the day.

And Mattheo took his studies seriously.

The occasional dabble in sex, drugs, and alcohol had temporarily become a second priority - however, evidently, that doesn't mean he wouldn't slip up every now and then.

"Oh, for fuck's sake." Mattheo muttered, jaw clenched, as he rolled his head back, raising his hands up slowly - incriminated, as if he'd been caught after years of being on the run.

Val was confused at first, she'd accidentally walked in on Mattheo and his crimes many times throughout their friendship.

It was only when Val turned to Magnora when she realised.