random shit and thoughts

Ice skating (very long :>)

Colorado, we stayed in our resort.

"Let's go ice skating after we ski today!" 

I exclaim to my mom.

"I'll take you afterwards." She responded.

——

As we walk to the ice rink, down the stairs, 

Me and my mom were fighting.

"It's fine whatever." I say.

I walk down the steps, 

Turn around,

She's gone.

I'll just wait here..

I wait by the steps, 

slowly getting more worried.

I examine everyone walking by,

Remembering what my mom was wearing.

Eyes are on me when people walk.

Tears start to form,

I push them away.

I ran over to the ice rink, 

and sat in a chair.

"Look at mom go!"

 A dad said next to his two little boys.

I stared at them.

And I began to cry again. 

No- stop crying.

You're not a baby. Grow up.

Be mature and get help.

I look back and forth, 

I wait there.

What was minutes felt like hours,

I stare at the ground shivering, my nose burning.

I notice a yellow ski patrol group.

I begin to walk towards them,

"Uhm excu-" 

I stop myself.

They don't want to help you.

They will just push you away, 

Be mature and figure this out by yourself.

I walk back over to the stairs, and there I see her.

"Mom!" I smile running over.

She grabbed me by the back of my neck.

"HOW DARE YOU. YOU SELFISH LITTLE BITCH."

my eyes widen, 

I let my tears fall as everyone watched us.

"I CANT BELIEVE YOU! THE NEEVE YOU HAVE TO WALK AWAY FROM ME JUST BECAUSE YOUR ANGRY?" 

"Walk away? No I-!" 

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU ARE SO DEAD. I DONT WANNA HEAR IT."

She stopped in front of me, 

Letting go, 

She shakes her finger in front of my face and continues to scream at me.

I cry hard.

"IS THIS HOW I RAISED YOU? I SAT THERE AT THE RESTAURANT WAITING TO SEE YOU FIND ME."

"I LEFT YOU THERE. I LEFT YOU THERE ON PURPOSE TO SEE IF YOU WOULD LEARN YOUR LESSON!"

She said.

"I LOOKED! I SWEAR I WAITES BY THE STAIRS-" I yelled back sobbing.

We walked over to the ice rink.

"Mom please, I just wanna go home I don't wanna ice skate anymore.."

"you will be quiet! I waited out in the cold for you, so know you will do as I say."

She paid for the skates, I wiped my tears.

I struggled to put them on,

And began crying.

"I'm sorry! I never meant to walk away, I waited for so long  and I was so worried I never was going to see you again! I swear! I was going to ask for help and I just don't want to lose you!"

 I wailed,

sobbing harder than ever before.

She hugged me.

"I believe you, I'm sorry."

My tears stained her sweater,

We sat there two long minutes crying and hugging each other.

"I'm sorry too.."

 my mom said beginning to cry herself.

I couldn't breathe,

I hiccup as I cry.

She turned over wiping her tears,

She finished tying my skates.

——-

I stepped onto the ice,

Everyone whooshing past.

I skated a round around the rink.

Then out of nowhere I noticed my mom struggling to get on.

"Mom? What are you doing?" I laughed.

"I wanted to pay you back!"

 She said, out of breath.

"You don't know how to skate!" 

I helped her up.

"Teach me!"

Slowly but surely, my mom and me talked and walked around the rink.

That day,

It felt different.

I felt happier than ever.

"I wish there was a place with really good hot chocolate."

My mom said looking at the ground.

"There is a Starbucks in the valet?" I said.

"Let's head there!" She said.

I grinned so big.

We got our drinks,

And we laughed together.

She didn't even sound like my mother.

Our bond,

Became tighter.

I was just so happy to be with her.

But it didn't last long,

Before she opened the door to see my brothers.