Train Tracks // Nick Wilkins x OC

baby food

Chapter 4

TW//mentions of an eating disorder; SH :(

Nick Wilkins looked bored of girls' night. He tried to pretend he was interested but would often switch the conversation to something he was more interested. I didn't complain. If he had a podcast, I would listen to it.

Either way, when the microphone became ours again, he would go silent and watch us as if we were a nature documentary and he were studying us. When he went to bed, earlier than usual, Casey immediately looked at me and grinned.

Getting the memo, Scar jumped up and speed-tiptoed to Nick's bedroom where I'd be sleeping. Casey opened a box underneath his bed, looked in his closet, and then left the room to peek inside the cabinet in the bathroom. Scar lifted his pillows and checked on his shelves. "What's up?" She asked me when she saw me standing by myself.

"I'm not sure I want to intrude on his privacy," I muttered awkwardly. "I mean, I wouldn't want him to read my diary."

"That makes sense," she grinned. "I guess we won't read it to you then, if we find it."

I snapped out of it and made my way through some random junk in his room. "Maybe he brought it with him when he went downstairs."

Nick saw me in the kitchen and immediately hid whatever he was holding, swallowing down a lump of food. "They're looking for your journal, you know," I smirked.

"I doubt they'll find it," Nick muttered back with his mouth full.

"What are you even eating?" I asked him and tried to walk around him. "Uh, nothing!"

I wrestled a small jar out of his arms. "What the heck..."

"I, uh..." he put his hand at the back of his neck. I took a spoon and scooped some of the mushy substance out of the jar. Hesitantly tasting it, I smiled and said, "whatever it is, I don't blame you."

He grinned. "Oh, so you like baby food?"

Stepping closer to him and trying to hide my embarrassed blush, I came back quickly with a "you first," and nudged him in the side. I noticed he looked exhausted. "You should get to bed," I told him with a concerned look on my face.

He groaned and wrapped me in a lazy hug. "Thanks for not judging me," he said as he waddled back with his blanket to lay on the sofa. I felt my face become hot.

"Who said I wasn't judging you?" I smirked and walked away. I forgot what I even came down for. "Did you find it?" Scar met me on the stairs.

"No, sorry. I might head to bed, though."

"Oh, okay, sorry. Good night!" She said softly and left to her sleeping bag. "We can find it another time." Casey gave me a snuggly hug and walked to her bedroom.

I climbed into bed and the first thing I noticed was that Nick's bed was amazing. It was soft but not squishy, it was firm but still bouncy. It seemed like he had jumped on it before. I smiled at the thought.

The second thing I noticed was my foot nudging against something hard. I rolled my eyes and sighed. What weird boy thing am I going to find now?

I slowly pulled a large book from underneath the blanket. It had a few stickers on the cover. Opening it to the first page, I read,

1/1

I told myself I would write in here every day. I may film some of the ideas I have or keep them close to myself. If anyone who is not supposed to be here is reading this, I advise you to close this book right now, or else you will probably think poorly of me in the future. Casey, I don't care how you think of me. I also know that no amount of convincing will get you to leave me and this journal alone, but I'll know. I'll know if you're here.

Nick

I giggled from the drama of his tone of writing and ignored his warnings. I flipped to a page I knew I wanted.

1/6

Today was a good day, for the most part. I bought a new sticker for this book. It's the one on the back cover with the plane that's on fire.

I put my finger in the pages and closed the book over my hand, keeping a literal hand-made bookmark for myself.

I saw a moving truck in my neighbor's driveway, so I baked some cookies with the gremlin using Aunt Bella's recipe. My new neighbor is really pretty with soft brown hair and big eyes that gleam when she's excited. She was wearing a dark maroon hoodie with a white cat being squished with an anvil with the words, "Are You Alright?" written beneath it. It looked as if she had painted it herself.

Blushing, blushing...

We talked for a while and listened to music. She even drew me, and I put the sketch here so I could keep it forever. I can tell we're going to be great friends.

Nick

I opened the folded piece of paper stuck inside with tape and recognized my own drawing of him. I'm surprised he kept it.

I decided not to show the girls. I thought it was genuinely sweet what he wrote and didn't want to embarrass him enough to stop writing. It was a good hobby, and healthy for him.

Before I fell asleep I pulled out my phone and went to YouTube Shorts. I flipped through some Lovejoy concert clips and some video game content. I went through some vlogs and eventually became so exhausted I couldn't focus on the screen anymore. I knew I had an addiction but I didn't realize it was this bad. My phone clock told me it was 4:30am. When did it get this late?

I went to the bathroom and stuck two fingers into my throat.. I knew I had forgotten to do it tonight. I felt such a need to do this, and I felt so bad for throwing up their food. Actually, it was a frozen pizza and baby food, so it wasn't the worst thing ever.

There was a knock on the door. "Occupied," I scrambled to say between taking handfuls of water from the sink to my mouth.

I flushed the toilet and opened the door. "Sorry about that," I muttered. I was immediately taken into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry," his voice said. It was a comforting voice. I returned the hug. "Thank you. It's getting better, or, that's what I'm telling myself. Why are you up?"

"I had to use the bathroom, and the one downstairs is not... not great." He laughed with his head on my shoulder. It was then I realized how much I loved his laugh.

I escaped from his arms and walked into the bedroom. The bathroom door shut as I sat on his bed. I can't believe he found out. Nobody knows that I have this. Not my parents, they wouldn't understand. It developed after Scar moved away. The friends I made after were not close enough or didn't care enough. I had never posted about it on social media. Nobody knew but me, and now Nick.

The light of the bathroom shone under the doorframe before he shut it off. "Do you want me to stay with you?" Nick asked me.

"Okay," I said quietly. He climbed into his bed and made plenty of room for me to be comfortable. "Thank you, Nick."

He leaned over and pulled me in to hug me. My head fell against his chest.

"Of course, Olivia," He returned. It was just how it had happened when we first met. I told him I couldn't handle compliments. He complimented me every chance he got during the rest of that conversation.

"I... I know we've only known each other for a few days. And I know this isn't exactly something friends do."

"Why not?" he asked. "I want to make sure you don't hurt yourself. I care about you."

My face became hot again so I buried it in his chest, where he couldn't see. "I guess we're best friends."

"I'm okay with that."

That was the last thing I heard before I fell asleep.

1419 words

A/N Sorry for not uploading yesterday! My only IRL friend moved across continents. Not to mention MatPat announced he was quitting. I tried to make a slightly longer chapter to make up for it. Also I'm too lazy to proofread

I have some plans, but where do you want me to take this story? LMK if u have any reccomendations or requests

Stay safe and don't hurt yourself babes <3