Focus Henry

His Love Language Vs Mine

He wants someone to love them as much as he does. I guess it's not enough. I really do try, but I don't know what to do. I'm an awkward person in that kind of situation. I want to give as many things as I can but I can't because I don't own a lot of things because I don't have a lot of money. I try to comfort him, but it doesn't seem enough. He almost seems rude to a point where I have to comfort my two other friends, therefore meaning I raise my voice to my boyfriend to knock it off. But then I feel bad because I don't want to do that but I really do care about my two other friends in that first period class and I would hate for them to hate me for taking my boyfriends side when all he does is complain. I wish he would keep it to himself, I understand he is a *picky* person when it comes to food and other things, but he doesn't need to make others feel bad for what they like to eat and talk about. Including me. I want to care and love for this person, but how can I do that if we don't agree on the same terms? What we like, how one is smarter than the other. I mean, the only time we can really agree is if I'm either telling a lie because I don't want to hurt them or it's a topic that I strongly disagree with. If this person truly does *love* me, I want them to prove it to me by at least trying to be more nicer to those people and my other friends if they encounter him. If not, then I don't know what to do or say anymore. It's hard for me to fall in love with someone because I don't know what it truly feels like. I've been broken up with once, and I used all my tears on her, so if it doesn't work out, this one. I won't cry because I will feel much more pain than that. Internally, I will scream and black out. Externally, I will remain silent and won't mention anything about it. All in all, I'd never want to have any experience like it ever again. Maybe it just won't be for me. Maybe later in life, I will be granted my wish for a better home, life, and future Husband/Wife. We will see what happens. They will probably read this, so this may not end up well. 😬