Dangerous...(a one direction fanfic)

* Don't make promises you can't keep *

* Lexi's P.O.V *

After sending the text to Jess, I sat down beside the cliff edge. I sighed to myself as I looked through all the pictures on my phone. I came across one of me, Jess and Josh.

''I'll be with you soon Joshy'' I whispered as I ran my thumb over Josh's face, tears silently falling down my face. I kept scrolling through them when a picture of me and Harry kissing appeared on the screen. A hard lump formed in my throat, I crossed the picture off and placed my phone on the ground beside me. I watched the line where the sea met the sky ignoring my phone as it rang millions of times. I tore my eyes away from the horizon and picked up my phone. 

34 missed calls

12 messages

8 voice mails

I clicked on the voice mails first, the first one was from Jess

''Lex, it's Jess please don't do anything stupid, I love you... I've already lost Josh, I can't afford to lose you as well. Please just answer, we're all worried sick!... Please just answer,I'm sorry and I love you''

Tears spilled down my cheeks as I clicked on the next one, it was from Harry...

''Lexi, it's me. Harry. Where are you? we are all worried sick!  please don't do anything stupid... Jess needs you. Just please call me back when you get this... Iloveyou''

''Lex it's Zayn, where the hell are you!? we have searched every where. I'm so worried about you, please just call back...''

I clicked the next one, it was Louis

''Lexi, Lou here where are Lil one? please let us know we're worried sick!''

''Lexi, babe please call back, I'm sorry about lastnight okay. I don't know what came over me... I just need to know you're safe. Jess is worried sick, we all are. I know you porbably hate me right now and I don't blame you but just let us know where you are, not only for me but for Jess and the rest of the boys...Just call back, yeah?''

Tears streamed down my face knowing it's the last time I'll ever hear their voices again.

''Lexi, it's Liam call me back when you get this.''

''Hey Lex, Nialler here. Where are you? Jess is in tears, I hate seeing her like this, I know I did wrong to her but please I hate it. She needs you Lexi so don't go doing anything stupid, Just let us know that you're okay''

I finally clicked on the last one it was from Jess...

''Hey Lexi, where are you? We've searched everywhere! I need you Lexi, do you remember when we were younger and you always promised that you'd always be here for me? we where are you now? I'm worried, anything could happen to you! I love you Lexi, I need you! just come home!...'' I heard Jess start sobbing hysterically on the end of the line. I heard shuffling then Niall's voice came on ''Lex, it's Niall just please come home'' 

I quickly scrolled through all the messages, they all said the same thing 'Lex come home' or 'Are you okay?' or 'Let us know where you are?'... Truth is I don't know if I am okay, I don't know anything apart from that today will be the last day I will open my eyes, the last day I will see my friends, the last day I will feel pain... The last day I will live...

I stood up and removed my jacket, I let it drop to the floor beside me. I shuffled closer to the edge, I watched the Waves crashing against the cliff.

''Come on Lexi...you can do this...don't be afraid...It's better up there than it is down here...'' I whispered to myself, my hands were shaking and my breath caught in my throat as I balanced on the edge.

''One more step and it's over...forever...'' I shut my eyes and took a deep shaky breathe. I threw my head back and looked at the sky above me, ''No more pain just happiness, sounds good'' I laughed to myself still staring at the sky. I'm ready...

''Don't do it!'' a voice yelled from behind me, it wasn't just any voice. It was the voice of the boy that hurts me, emotionally and physically. The boy who ruined my life. The boys I love...

''Why?'' I sighed before turning around to face the curly haired boy. ''Because you have so much to live for'' Harry whispered, walking closer to me. ''I've got nothing left!'' I snapped, Harry sighed and brushed his curls away from his face.

''We've been looking for you for ages...I thought it was too late-''. ''It is too late!'' I yelled cutting him off. ''No, no it's not, I'm here and if you jump I jump...'' He got closer and closer with every word. ''There's no point in me anymore, I ruin everything... I can't even keep a relationship together neverind my life, don't you understand?'' I looked at Harry through tears. ''I'm broken, Harry, Broken'' I whispered as the tears leaked out of my eyes.

''You're too young to let the world break you, and right now is not the perfect time to jump'' Harry said.

''You cannot always wait for the perfect moment, sometimes you must dare to jump..'' I told him. He just stood there in silence looking at me through tears.

''You know all my life I've been trying to find the problem that fucks my life up when I'm happy. Now I finally know what it is. It's me. I'm the problem... I'm one of those problems that can't be fixed. I feel lost inside myself, it hurts...No one will ever understand how much it hurts, I never thought my life would turn out like this. But it has and now nobody cares until it's too late!...I'm tired of living and scared of dying, but  they always say face your fears, right?...I never really understood life, now I realised that there's nothing to understand. It's just a big game bit it didn't come with instructions or rules so...people have to make something out of nothing.'' I wiped my tears away before letting Harry speak.

''I'm sorry Lexi, I didn't mean to hurt you'' Harry whispered before locking his eyes with his feet.

''You can say sorry as much as you like and that you never meant to hurt me but you knew damn well what you were doing, you knew damn well you were ripping me apart!...All you do is take and now I've got nothing left to give you. So you're telling me not to jump but when we get home everything is going to go back to normal and all this bullshit will be forgotten...Do you know what it feels like to hold on to something hoping it will come back but knowing it wont?'' I looked him in the eyes through my tears. It was hard looking in to his eyes, I mean I love him but I hate him... I waited for a response but he didn't answer. 

''Well?'' I asked, he turned his head away breaking the eye contact. I sighed before picking my jacket up off the floor, I pulled it over my small frame. I then grabbed my phone and slid it in to my pocket before sitting down on the edge of the cliff with my feet dangling over the edge. My eyes were fixed on the setting sun that beamed on the sea. ''Maybe the world ain't such a bad place'' I whispered to myself. I took a deep breath, I've walked this path too long maybe it's time to change direction.

''I'll help you through this'' Harry whispered as he sat beside me. I turned to him.

''Don't make promises you can't keep...''