Back to You

Mia

After spending about 10 minutes in the bathroom, I finally found the courage to unlock the door. My face was a disaster, my eyes were red rimmed from the crying I've been doing for the last 10 minutes. I found my manager and let her know that I didn't feel too good and I'm sure she can tell by the state of my face. I left through the back door making sure that I avoided everybody. Once I made my way to my car, I drove back to my apartment, it was like I was on autopilot because I don't really remember pulling into a car spot and walking the short distance to our apartment block. My mind was overloaded. I can't believe that Ethan is here, and he knows I'm here. This can only end in disaster. My mind is racing, do I need to pack everything and leave again, then he wouldn't know where I am. I'd go to a small town with no hockey then I know he would never find me.

As I was walking up to our apartment, I took a look at my phone and I had a message from Amelia and I froze. I hope she didn't say anything to them, I hope they didn't say anything to her. I haven't told her about my past at all. All she knows is that we came here for Ella's uni starting in the fall. She's been a really good friend to me in the last few months. I read the message and let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding. She was just saying that she hopes I feel better. Maybe they didn't go and talk to her after I bolted.

I unlock the front door and as soon as it's closed, I collapse against it and the tear start to flow again. I didn't even hear Ella come towards me, but she sits down and puts her arms around me rubbing my back, trying to sooth me "What wrong?"

I don't even know if I can talk at the moment, the tears are falling and I'm sobbing gasping for air, but I have to try Ella will help me, she always has "E... E.... Ethan" is finally get out between sobs. "He... here" Ella stops rubbing my back, she's in shock just like me. She pulls away slightly now looking at my face, which I'm sure is blotchy with makeup running down my cheeks.

"Ethan is here, in Manchester? You saw him" I can't speak to her so I nod

"Did you talk to him?" I shake my head indicating no

"Why is he here?" I don't answer that question, that requires me to talk and I just can't at the moment so I bury my head into my knees and continue to cry.

"Mia you're going to have to talk for me to understand what's going on" I know she's right. I take a few deep breaths and Ella gets up and grabs a bottle of water from the fridge. When she reaches me, she holds out her hands for me to take so I can stand up. Yeah, sitting on the cold floor against the door is not the most comfortable position. She guides me over to the couch and we sit down. I open the water and take a few sips and take a few deep breaths before putting the bottle on the table in front of me.

I look towards Ella who is sitting right next to me. She reaches out and places her hands on top of mine as if she is reassuring me. She looks so worried though. I'm wondering if she's thinking the same as me, that we might need to move again. I'm her big sister I should be taking care of her not the other way around. She has help me through so much these last few years, more than she'll ever know, she needs to be living her life, not worrying about me all the time.

I take another deep breath before I start to explain what happened. "The hockey regionals are being played here next weekend" and she rubs my hands letting me know to continue "I was working the bar and I first saw Jake walk in and we both froze, then Ethan looked up and saw me too. I had to get out of there. I walked straight out the back and told my manager I wasn't feeling well and came home. I panicked Ella, he must hate me all over again. You should of seen the look in his eyes. I know he will keep coming back to work until I talk to him either him or Jake. I don't know what to do. He looked so confused when he saw me, like he didn't believe it was me at first. I guess he didn't expect to run into me here. What do I do?"

I look towards Ella and I can tell she's trying to work out what to say. "I think you need to talk to him. I think he needs to know" I know she's right but how; how do I explain anything to him except for giving him the whole story about Ryan. I'm not sure I can tell him that.

"I miss him so much Ella" I break down again and lean into her as she wraps her arms back around me.

"Shhh I know you do" she continues to rub my back and stroke my hair to calm my tears "He deserves to know. Just think about" and that's all that's said. I know I need to tell him, I just don't know how he will take it. He may hate me even more, but it's something I have to do. We remain sitting on the lounge, with Ella hugging me until I eventually fall asleep.