Selfless

Chapter 48

"Baby, wake up." I whisper to Sadia as I lay next to her.

After finding out about her mom she did nothing but cry all day, I tried to be there for her and comfort her but of course it didn't really do much. I wish I could take her pain away.

She groans and turns to me, her eyes puffy from all her crying. "I want to sleep." She mumbles, her voice weak.

"Ok, hermosa. You can." I kiss her cheek and start to get up but she grabs my arm.

"Will you stay please?" Her voice breaks a bit.

I wanted breakfast but of course I'm not gonna tell her no. I give her a small smile and lay back down, pulling her close.

She buries her head into my chest.

"He's not real." She mutters, seeming to be holding back tears.

"Who, baby?" I rub her back.

"Allah. Otherwise why would he let this happen."

I sigh. "Hermosa, God doesn't control what people do, that wasn't his promise. Farbod is the reason your mother is gone, not god. In this world bad things are gonna happen but we have the promise of heaven to look forward and I think people who pass, do so because it's their time to go. Your mother is at peace, no longer does she have to put up with Farbod."

She sits up, with a glare on me. "That's such bullshit. She could have been at peace if she would have left."

I'm a little surprised by her hostility. "I don't think it is, love." I say gently.

She rolls her eyes and turns the other way. "Whatever. You don't even understand, you've never lost anyone important to you."

I clear my throat. "Not to death but I've had my heart broken." I mumble, although I know it isn't the same but during that period of my life I could have asked god why he let Emma do what she did to me.

She scoffs, back still facing me. "That slut cheating on you is not the same. The fact your still hurt by that is concerning when your with me now."

I sigh. "No, I'm definitely over it now and of course it isn't the same but I loved her and she hurt me. I could have asked god why he let her do that or why he let me believe she was the one for me. My point is that I know he doesn't control what happens to us."

"You hear people that have survived the craziest shit but my maman has to die to that bastard. I don't understand." Her voice is quiet now.

I move closer and wrap my arms around her. "Nobody does, love. I don't know how you view Jesus but he was a perfect person, never sinned and suffered a terrible death for the sins of others. He was god's son and God still didn't intervene with his death."

I feel her trying to turn around and I move back a bit to let her. She stares at me, tears on her cheeks but a small smile on her lips. "Just be a preacher at this point."

I chuckle. I love god and all but I don't want that, although I don't mind talking to people about him.

She lets out a small giggle herself at mine, putting a small small on me. "Thank you, I needed that." She whispers.

"Of course, my love." I kiss her forehead. "I'm honestly starving, could I go get some breakfast? I bring you some too." I mutter against it.

She laughs again. "Sure."

I give her face a few more kisses before leaving my room and going downstairs.

I find everyone up, then I remember today is Sunday so they're going to church.