Kira Modest

Chapter 16

                                       Shift 4

Navigating through the maze, I open the doors to the hall. Bright colored lights slightly blinded me. While I stood near the DJ and waited my turn, I managed to make out who had arrived at the club. It was a group of five young guys. Climbing onto the pole and taking a closer look at them, I noticed that they seemed poor, however rude it may sound. But it's normal in the strip club, as big money is usually spent here. Therefore, I didn't show much interest in them, and they didn't look at me either, which seemed strange. A man around forty-five sat a little further away. And he looked at me with such intensity, showing clearly that I was not to his taste, that it suddenly made me feel squeezed. For the first time on stage, I feel unattractive. I hate it so much! I move to the second pole, and two more guests enter the hall — men in their thirties, quite handsome and looking expensive. Seeing me, they whispered to each other, and one of them shook his head expressing his 'no'. What's happening today?

Do they really want to crush my self-esteem? Is it because I bought beautiful lingerie for the first time to please their eyes and made a mistake? Is it really that bad? No! Everyone complimented me, and I'm not blind either! Oh, God, now I'll have to take off my bra too! How do I do that? I feel embarrassed to undress in front of them after their reaction! I let my voluminous curls fall forward and, covering my chest with them and take off my bra. I scan the hall, waiting to see their reaction. Hah! Is no one even looking?! What's wrong with them today? Maybe it's just that I did my makeup poorly? What's the matter?! I want to leave this stage as soon as possible. I feel ashamed to be here...

"Mary! Do I really look that bad?" I immediately rush into the dressing room.

"No, you're beautiful as always. Why do you ask?" 

"Because those blind, there's no other way to put it, guys made me doubt myself and my beauty with their whole demeanor!" 

"Haha, bunny, they're just not your audience. They will worship you not every day." She is surprised by my anger.

"Every day! I've already gotten used to it!" I say as I angrily and clear all the makeup from my table.

"Relax, Kara. It's normal. You can't please everyone." She responds more seriously and looks displeased with me.

"I don't care who likes me or not! I'll sit in this dressing room until morning! It's shameful to go out into the hall..." I drop my head into my hands, covering my face.

"You're taking it too hard. You should approach this easier. When you go to the market to pick something, not everything suits you either..."

What? Market? The whore's market... She left out one word.

Ugh...that sounds so disgusting. And am I really here? 

"Don't worry, you'll get used to it soon," she finished.

"No, Mary, I won't get used to it," I replied coldly and turned away.

She understood perfectly what I meant. I've told her this a hundred times already. Why does she bring it up again? 

I lay on the dressing room couch until half past three in the morning, feeling miserable. I decide to brush it off and go dance; after all, I love it! 

I wait for my turn and, touching up my makeup, step out into the hall. I carry myself as always, with my head held high and a self-absorbed smile. Full of confidence and sensuality. I climb onto the pole, not noticing anyone around, only myself in the mirror, which is two meters away from me. I look absolutely stunning! And a track starts playing, perfectly matching my movements. I dance and enjoy it to the fullest! Every movement and wave of my body. Sometimes I just glance at my figure and smile in admiration every time! I kneel down to make it easier to take off my bra. There's a young handsome guy in front of me. He's sitting with his friend in chairs positioned right next to the stage. With his arm bent at the elbow, he's holding 5 hundred dollar bills. I drool mentally. He's holding it and waving it slightly, unsure how to give it to me. I understand this, so without removing my bra, I get on all fours and gently crawl towards him. I glance carefully at the elastic of my panties, and he stands up to slip me the money.