Kira Modest

Chapter 12

Great, I have a whole three hours to sleep before the second class. This time, I'm already collapsing, not feeling my legs and the soft bed beneath me in some places. Not even thoughts are tormenting me; they probably have no energy left either, and my subconscious has decided it's useless. I set the alarm and instantly fall asleep. 

Suddenly, I startle from Polina's voice above me:

"Kira," she shakes me by the shoulder, "Kira, did your classes get canceled?"

I look at her with sleepy eyes:

"Polina, I have to go to the second class, I already have little time to sleep, and you woke me up even earlier."

"I don't want to upset you, but the fourth class has already begun."

"What?" I interrupt her sharply and spring out of bed.

"Yes, I just finished my third class and came home."

"Are you kidding me? How could I oversleep?" I got out of bed and, I don't know why, I started pacing around the room, packing unnecessary things into my backpack for the university. "I set the alarm and...oh no!" I missed three calls from Sansa and Arthur! They probably wanted to remind me that we have classes!!! Oh! I'm so angry with myself!

"Kira," Polina says calmly, with surprised eyes, "Kira, calm down. Nothing terrible happened. So, you overslept, who hasn't? And in your situation with this night job, it's even normal." 

I immediately stopped and regulated my breathing. For a moment, I thought she found out about my job; it seemed like it was turning into paranoia. Then I realized she was right, and I needed to calm down. And now, as my breathing returned to normal, I felt my body terribly exhausted. I feel myself weak, wanting to crawl back into bed and just not move. I felt very lethargic, almost like a boiled vegetable. I understood that this disrupted schedule was taking its toll and that I had only slept for about three hours in the last twenty-four hours. No wonder I didn't hear the alarms and calls from my friends. 

"Lie down and calm down, I didn't realize you were so nervous. I'll bring you some tea," 

Polina," I approached and hugged her. I wanted to talk to someone about everything, to be hugged, held close, sympathized with, and most importantly, not judged! "Thank you so much."

I'm so tired...

I felt like I was about to cry, a lump forming in my throat. But I didn't want that; I didn't want to unload my problems onto her. Besides, Polina would have too many questions, and I wouldn't be able to explain my tears. 

"What happened to you? You can tell me." She said gently, not letting go of me.

"No, no, everything is fine. I just didn't sleep much, so I'm tired. I'll get some rest, and it'll pass." 

I lie down in bed, pick up my phone, see the time, and realize that I won't go to classes. I start drifting back to sleep. There's one missed call from my mom on the phone. As soon as I press the call button, the phone starts ringing again. It's mom. 

"Hi, mom. I was just about to call you," I answer weakly.

"Hi, honey, how are you? It's been so long since we talked, I miss you. Don't you want to come over for the weekend?" She offers with a happy voice.

"Only if you kick dad out so we don't cross paths," I reply in ironically cold voice.

"Why would you say something like that! It hurts me to hear that," my mom responds, offended.

"I'm sorry." I feel ashamed for making my mom feel bad. 

I understand she's not to blame for this. My enemy of the people is my dad. There's nothing I can do about it.

"How long will you keep making us worry?" She accuses me.

"Mom, come on, for God's sake! What does this have to do with me at all? I left, that's it. What complaints do you have against me? I'm already earning a living myself, and we don't need to touch on the topic with dad. You know that." I respond stubbornly.

"I hope you'll come to your senses soon and grow up!" 

"Yeah, Mom, I already have. We'll talk later. For now," I hang up because I don't want to continue this.

Enough already. Nothing changes. Don't be angry with dad. Think. Grow up. Stop being selfish... I want to go to the club. I caught myself wanting to go to the club where I work. I want it, that's all. And I can't explain it. I just had so much fun there. I want to relax and have fun. I want to look beautiful. To do this, I need new lingerie. 

I coordinate with the manager that I'll take the shift today and head out to the shops. 

I stroll through the shopping center and enter the first store. The window displayed an insanely sexy bright red set. I took it to try on. It didn't fit. I tried the second...third...fourth set, and finally found mine in the last boutique! It was insanely beautiful. It was made of very pleasant material, if you look closely, you can see that the fabric is in tiny mesh. I don't even know what it's called. The bra fits perfectly on my small chest, there's a black elastic band underneath it that wraps around me. It extends about a couple of centimeters from the bra, clinging to it with tiny straps. The bands from the panties, which sit on the waist, delicately accentuate it. And the back of the panties, cut like a thong, beautifully rounds out my toned butt. Its pattern is feline. The wildest and incomparably magnificent cat — leopard. Despite its color, the set looks insanely expensive and, despite its pattern, understated. But it looks insanely sexy on me. I look at myself in the mirror, examining every edge of the fabric, it's like glued on. It fits so perfectly with my skin. Now, will I and my panther-like pattern fit the name of the club? I didn't notice why or at what moment I wanted to match this name. After all, I didn't care how I looked there. I insisted that men there were unworthy of beautiful costumes. Hmm...what influenced me so much? Their good attitude towards me or Mary's collection of costumes? Interesting, but it doesn't matter! I already want to get on stage under the neon lights and feast on compliments from men.