Love doesn't have to be hard

Chapter 43: I just don't know

It had been three days since Zed had left and we had spoken. He would let the kids call me, but we didn't speak. He has given me the space I asked for, and I was so thankful for that.

Hardin has been here and keeping me company. He has ensured I eat and the kids are taken care of. I have barely moved off the couch and have pretty much stared off into space. 

I am trying to wrap my head around this entire situation. Hardin has actually helped me see that Zed honestly didn't cheat on me, and it was a simple mistake.

I grab my phone and Text Zed, "I think it's time we talk face to face."

"Okay, just tell me what time to be there. The twins are missing you."

"I miss them as well. I just haven't really done anything. I have just been thinking."

"I'm so sorry, baby, that's all I can say. I will spend the rest of my life making this up to you."

"I know, Zed. Be here at eight, please. They will be in bed. Izzy and Liam will be in their room."

"Okay, I will see you at eight tonight. Thank you for keeping your word and messaging me when you were ready."

"See you then." That was the end of our conversation. I laid my phone on the table. 

"I text him, and he will be here at eight."

"Good, I think you are doing the right thing. He will spend the rest of his life making this up to you."

"I know, but it just hurts so damn bad. I have been so numb since this thing started and since he left."

"I know it does, and it should, but you have to understand the entire situation. You know Zed and you know he would never do this or let this happen sober."

"I know. Did he go get the test done?"

"He did, but last I heard, he hasn't gotten the results back. I just hope he can save this kid's life. No child should ever have to go through this." 

"You are so very right. I have been praying for this child, who I guess is my step-child. I never thought I would say that. I thought Zed and I would only have our four children. The children we created together."

"I know, Tess, and so did he. The worst part is he is blaming himself so much because of this and for hurting you. I think that is bothering him more than anything is the pain this has caused you."  

"I know you and he have been talking. How is your wife? I'm surprised she doesn't want you home knowing you and I are here alone and that me and my husband are having issues."

"Oh, she knows, and she understands that I am the neutral party here to help my friends through this rough patch. Are you going to tell Zed that you tried to get me to sleep with you, and I declined."

"I will tell him the truth. I won't lie to him."

"Okay, good. Tessa, marriage is a job twenty-four-seven. It's not easy for most people, but for you and Zed, it has been all sunshine. I think this was a hiccup and a few cloudy days, but I see the sun shining through those clouds, and I know you two will get through this."

"Hardin, thank you for being an amazing friend. You and Kim have really helped me deal with this. I guess Zed will have to fly to Memphis to do this transplant if he matches."

"Yep, and I guess you will need to go with him."

"I don't know if I can do that. This is the woman he cheated on me with. I know he didn't mean to cheat. He was drunk and don't even remember it, but still."