labyrinth - c. sturniolo ✓

044 - ❝ as a family ❞

CHAPTER FOURTY-FOUR
[ real life ]

❝ AS A FAMILY ❞

slight warning: panic attack, keep this in mind while reading if you're sensitive to this topic please‼️

ʳᵉᵃˡ ˡⁱᶠᵉ

the sun beams shone through the small gap in between the white crimped curtains beside me. i squirmed and turned away from the windows, digging my head into the pillow under me. i didn't want to sacrifice one more blink of sleep, the day ahead definitely needed all the energy i could ever have.

before i could drift back to sleep, the door beside me creaked open, inviting a new light into the room.

"lizzie?" i mumbled into the pillow, the word barely being distinguishable.

"nope," he said, walking in and closing the door behind him. i opened my eyes, turning my head towards the door to confirm my beliefs on who it was. "chris." he said, making me smile.

"hey," i said, slowly starting to sit up. if i tried falling back asleep now, there's no chance i actually will.

"hey," chris repeated. "did i wake you?"

"no," i said in reply, fully sitting up and resting my back against the headboard. "what's up?" i asked, finally being awake enough to realize that chris was in my room.

"just wanted to see if you were awake." he said, inviting himself inside and onto my bed next to me. "which you are." he added on, resting his back on the headboard, doing exactly what i was doing.

i hummed in response, moving some pillows out the way so there would be barely any obstacles between us.

"i was thinking about yesterday," he paused, getting more situated in the sheets under him. "are you actually going to bring a date to your mom's wedding?" he asked, making my heart drop just a little. i hadn't thought about that ever since the words left my moms mouth the day before, now a new weight being put on my shoulder.

"i'm not sure yet." i hesitated, looking away from chris' eyes to look at my fidgety fingers. "i've had my eyes on someone for a little now but i don't know if i'm ready to start something with them." i admitted, purposely not saying names.

"really?" he asked, making me divert my gaze back to him.

"yeah," i said, moving my lips into a straight line.

"you know, if things don't work out you can alway-"

"we're leaving in 20 minutes, hurry up!" xavier popped into the room, interrupting chris. both of us snapped our necks to him before turning our attention back to eachother.

"what were you going to say?" i asked, a smile ready to pop up on my face due to xavier's random presence.

"nothing, we should go get ready." he said, getting up awfully quickly before giving me a small smile and walking out. i was quick to return the smile, slight confusion from his actions flowing in my head.

i got ready the quickest i could, surprisingly picking a good outfit and doing my makeup and hair pretty well. our plans were to go top golfing and find somewhere close to eat dinner before it gets too late. we thought that the earlier we leave, the more fun we would have.

"i'm ready!" i said to no one in particular, walking out my room. no one was in the living room, no one was in the kitchen and no one was in my bedroom. they were all doing their own thing in their owns rooms, doors closed and silence.

this is where it hit me. i looked around the room i was in, spotting the same couch i sat on years before, the same tv i watched cartoons on when i was little, the same carpet i probably got rug burn on for years at a time and the doorway to the same kitchen i grew up in. the same kitchen i made breakfast in, the same kitchen i ate dinner as a family in.

as a family.

suddenly my heart felt like a giant weight as a wave of apprehensiveness rushed through my chest. it was all coming back, the memories. my mind jumped from one thought to another, almost immediately filling my head with worry. my childhood home was where i was, the home where everything i never wish would happen actually happened.

my mind started to fog up, my breathing getting heavier and irregular. i felt my heartbeat in my head as my legs started getting weaker. i slowly kneeled down onto the carpet below me, placing my hand on my chest and trying to catch my breath once again. i tried breathing in and out, slowly inhaling, then slowly exhaling as my breathing got more controlled.

"ams?" chris entered the room, seeing me on my knees. "you okay?" he said, kneeling down near me.

"huh? yeah, just dropped something." i said, hiding the worry in my tone. "we all ready to go?" i said once i noticed everyone else leaving their rooms and walking over to us on the ground. chris got up, holding his hand out for me as i used it to get up myself. he led me and everyone else to the car, us finally being able to get a hold of my moms minivan.

chris and i sat in the far back. it wasn't like i had a choice, chris hadn't left my side for minutes now. lizzie and matt were in the front, talking about food while nick and xavier were in the middle seats, showing eachother things on their phones.

"are you sure you're okay?" chris asked one more time, turning his attention from the window to me.

i hummed in response, also diverting my attention to him. "i told you i just dropped something." i said, giving him a small smile.

"okay," he nodded, his tone hesitant.

"who's ready for top golf?!" matt's words echoed through the car, getting many reactions from everyone else as he drove out of our neighborhood.

"i am!!" lizzie said in response, excitement prominent in her voice. the rest of us cooed and laughed together, finding comfort in each other as we drove through streets on our way to have a fun time together.

maybe, i did find family.

authors note 💌

this is a really short chapter but it's so hard making these type of chaps 😞😞

sorry for the bad comeback after like a week of not updating, forgive me pls 🙏🙏