The girl next door, - ᴛ.ᴋᴀᴜʟɪᴛᴢ

chapter fourteen.

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☠︎︎ 𝙼𝙰𝙽𝙳𝚈'𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝚅

The three days that passed were all in a blur of sleeping and using. I was craving but didn't want to get out of bed.

I did things around my room. Got high from Seb's stash, unboxed some other boxes, but I couldn't breathe. I was in such panic and distress, and everything felt like it was coming onto me all at once. I needed an outlet, but I didn't seem to have one.

Thunder and lightning striked outside my window, heavy rain and hail thudding.

Rain was casual, pounding against the window and making me toss and turn. It was late, somewhere around two or three.

I just sat in bed with my knees to my chest and staring at the small box on my desk with a baggie of weed to my side, and an open book by my feet with the pages torn.

I didn't believe Seb when he told me crystal meth was addictive. I still don't. But I never needed something more. I was craving it, having a desire to just stick that needle in my arm and drift away. That shit was real because it tells it. It's instant relief.

But I was also trying to hold back. Too much of that shit and I'll turn into my mother. I don't want that. I'm better than that.

I started using before I was drinking. When we first came to Germany as a coping method. It's working too well.

Seb walked by my door, murmuring. "Go to bed and turn off your light, I can see it from my room."

"Fuck off," I just looked down, tucking the weed into the papers. I licked the end, roling it and checking the sides.

You kind of memorise it when you were four and rolling joints for your parents because of your small fingers.

"Always fucking smoking now, aren't you?" Seb scoffed, running a hand through his hair before heading off. Small mumbles from Mario and him before the door closed with a faint click, and the silence returned.
Worse this time.

I shifted, sitting up as I lit up my joint and took a drag as I looked around.

And then I heard my window open.

I took another drag of the blunt, rocking myself back and forth on my bed as I looked over to Tom with a small exhale.

I felt annoyed with myself for earlier. It wasn't his fault; it was mine.

Before I spoke, I slid off of my bed and hugged him tight. He stood still, one of his arms wrapping around my waist quietly.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, immediately starting to sob. "I don't want you to be mad at me too."

"I'm not," He mumbled, rubbing the small of my back. There was no direct response. He was obviously mad, but what could I do?

Tom's fingers flexed around my hips, his lips grazing my temple. "Mandy, I'm not mad. Are you?"

I hesitated for a minute, shaking my head. "But you should have listened." I mumbled, cupping his cheek and tracing the bruise on his jawline.

His face hardened for a minute, but he just nodded and listened before talking. "Well, I didn't think he would punch me, did I?" He spoke coldly, letting out a sigh.

He was frustrated, and it was oddly attractive.

"Tom?" I mumbled, watching his gaze drift to my lips. His eyes softened, his lips parting but his voice barely audible.

"Yes?"

I leaned up, my hands going to each side of his neck as I pulled him into a kiss and felt his arms wrap tightly around my waist.

☠︎︎ 𝚃𝙾𝙼'𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝚅

This wasn't the way, but I could make it one.

My arms wrapped tightly around her as we both dropped to the floor with a light thud, and immediately started to undress.