• JIGSAW FALLING INTO PLACE - RADIOHEAD
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I was discharged after about 4 days. Mario was picking me up, spotting his truck as I walked out in just a hospital gown and a small zip lock bag of my belongings.
"Where are your clothes?" Mario questioned, leaning over to open the door. I got in, letting out a long sigh. "I left first thing, couldn't find them anyways. I think some kids down from my room took them while I was with the nurse." I mumbled, rubbing my arms.
He chuckled but went silent for a minute.
"Why'd you do it, Mandy?"
"I don't know. It was an accident."
One thing I knew was that before I overdosed, I just felt this.. overwhelming depression. I just felt so empty and sad.
Mario let out a long sigh, shifting gears. "You know, that's what I told myself when I overdosed at your age. Keep telling yourself that, Mandy, but it isn't the answer."
I didn't reply or listen, just fiddled with the hospice band on my wrist and looked out the window while he drove. The snow was heavy, the car warm despite the freezing weather.
☠︎︎ 𝙼𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙾'𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝚅
She was pale, skinnier than before. I've known this kid since she was a baby, I was the one changing her and feeding her, raising her with Seb because their parents wouldn't.
It hurt to see her struggle. Mandy was a sweet girl. Damnit, a year ago, she wouldn't even ask without taking a piece of fruit. But now, she's sneaking around and going to parties, getting some thug boyfriend and slowly killing herself with drugs.
And all Seb wanted was to keep her safe and loved, to get her under a roof with food on the table. But she didn't appreciate him anymore. This was the nearer end of her kind and innocent adolescence.
"I haven't seen you around," Mandy said quietly. "No, I've been around. You just haven't." I said blankly, glancing at her while she shifted uncomfortably, guilt evident in her glassy eyes. I sighed and continued to drive quietly.
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☠︎︎ 𝙼𝙰𝙽𝙳𝚈'𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝚅
When Mario had dropped me off, the house was quiet. The house was never quiet.
I approached the door, pulling open my plastic bag and grabbing out my keys. Once unlocking, I headed in, looking at my father, who was passed out on the couch.
That's why. Fucking drunk.
I headed upstairs slowly, taking my time with each step to soothe my aching chest and my throbbing head. My eyes flickered to Seb's door, locked, no music or chatter behind it whatsoever. I then looked at my door, walking in and getting out of the hospital gown to just underwear and a bra on underneath.
For a minute, I just stared at myself in the mirror and how pale my skin was. As light as milk.
My form was skinny, almost slender. In a bad way. I didn't eat often, not anymore anyways. Seb always said I did get snappy or mean when I was hungry.
But there was better things to do other than eat all day.
My eyes drifted to the kit on my desk, my face hardening.
I don't need drugs.
I'm tired of making everybody disappointed. I'm sick of losing the people I love. Fuck drugs. I don't need them. It's time to get clean.
That's what I told myself right before I shot up again.
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The girl next door, - ᴛ.ᴋᴀᴜʟɪᴛᴢ
RomantizmA raw and revealing look into the urban adolescence of 2007. Sex, drugs, and mischief, including five foreigners looking for any kind of colour in their no-good lives. ★ »-☠︎︎-+> 𝖛𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖐𝖆𝖚𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖟 1 on #tomka...