𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐑𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 //𝐓𝐨𝐦𝐛𝐨𝐨

Chapt. 13

TW:  Talk about scars A LOT

He/Him for ranboo this chapt as well.

Ranboo's POV

Tommy finally drifted away into a heavy sleep. I squeezed him a bit harder and closer towards me. I kissed the top of his head and dug my face into his curly, blonde hair. I was so happy that I finally had him. That I finally had him in my arms instead of just right next to me. I wanted him wrapped inside my skin.

I looked over his head and looked at his whole body. He had lost so much weight the past years, he's gotten really skinny. I was a lot concerned over him, he barely eats and he keeps getting skinnier. I hope that his eating gets better.

His hoodie sleeves were rolled up a bit and I was looking at his arms when I saw a glimpse of a wound on his arm. I reached down to his sleeve and rolled up the sleeves to reveal his whole arm and his whole arm was filled with purple, deep scars and fresh wounds on top of many of his scars. My heart immediately dropped and my whole world was paused for a second. I couldn't believe that he had relapsed for so long and I never realized. I flipped his arm to reveal his wrists and they were also filled up with wounds and scars. There was this deep, purple scar right on top of his main artery, the scar was almost one centimeter wide. 

I started to tear up and tremble because of seeing the amount of pain that he was going thru. This might be the reason why he was sleeping with a hoodie last night, I thought quietly for myself. 

It's probably also the reason why he's been acting up recently, and the time when he went into the bathroom and I heard something metal falling... His voice was shaky when he answered me as well. 

I almost started to tear up, I was left in absolute shock. I felt like a bad friend for not noticing. He could have died if he went deeper or if he didn't stop the bleeding. His arms and wrists look like absolute hell, he had white scars, light pink scars, purple scars and fresh scars all stacked on top of each other. 

-Oh my, darling. I whispered as a tear roll down. I put an arm around his head and kiss the top of his head as I burried my face deep into his hair.

I looked up from his hair and rolled down his sleeves so he wouldn't wake up to this. The painful part is that I have to talk to him about it in the morning. 

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Tommy's POV

I felt heavy, but in a good way. I started to slowly hear the sound of a TV show, I don't know which one. My eyes opened slowly until I got my bearings. I was lying on the couch whilst cuddling up to Ranboo, just like how I fell asleep. 

I yawned before turning my head around to face Ranboo. He was fully awake and happy to see me finally awake. He smiled at me as he stroked his hand thru my hair.

-Good morning. He murmured with a warm smile.

-Good morning. I whispered back with a wide smile.

I sat up beside him and slumped down on his shoulder.

-Are you hungry? Do you want me to make any food? He asked me as he put an arm around me and pulled me closer.

-Soon. I replied with a smile. This is one of the first times where I've actually woken up feeling okay and not like an absolute rollercoaster of emotions.

-I'm just gonna go brush my teeth. I said as I tilted my head to face Ranboo as I smiled. I gave him a small peck on his cheek before getting up from the couch and to the bathroom.

I looked into the mirror and I looked like shit. I had deep, blue eye bags and my lips were pale and dry. I quickly brushed my teeth and then put on some vaseline. I looked myself in the mirror one last time before walking out.

I already saw Ranboo standing up with his head down and his fingers pinching his other arm, he does this when he's nervous. He has done this ever since we met, it means that he has something to say but it's nerve wracking for him. 

-Ran... what is it...? I asked him as I got closer to him.

He looked up and looked directly into my eyes.

-Uhm... Tommy I-... I saw your scars... He said with a shaky voice.

My heart dropped. It felt like all the blood in my body went to my feet, I felt like I was about to faint. My breathing got heavier and faster. I looked down in guilt. 'Shit... I've been caught...' tha thought echoed thru my head a million times before getting interupted.

-Tommy... I'm not mad or anything, I just wanna know why you did it and why you get so triggered often. Ranboo said whilst walking closer and closer to me, until he was right in front of me.

I put my arms around myself and held myself tight whilst looking down at my socks. 

-Tommy, are you okay? Ranboo asked. His voice almost sounds muffled, the only thing I could hear the loudest were my thoughts.

-Tommy...? Ranboo asked again as his voice started to shake again. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly.

I start to sob, great. I felt pathetic for crying, I felt like I was weak for expressing emotions like sadness or anger. 

-I'm so sorry... Is the only thing I was able to push out of my throat.

-Please don't apologize, we will get thru this, my love. Ranboo quaked, but his words were slightly muffled by my hair. 

-How long have you been doing this without me noticing? Ranboo said under his breath, trying to keep his calm and not break down.

-I never really stopped... The longest clean I was when I was clean for 2 years, but then I relapsed and that has led to now... I mumbled, my voice was quaky and hard to understand.

-When did you relapse? Ranboo kept his calm and murmured. 

-About 6 months ago maybe? My voice was officially an earthquake, I don't understand how he still understood what I was saying.

-It's okay, we will get thru with this, I promise. He whispered calmly into my hair and he gently laid two pecks on my head.

-But what if there is no cure? What if this is just how it's going to be..? I babbled out.

-My love, I promise you that there is a cure to everything. I'm gonna help you thru every day. Ranboo said as he pulled us apart and looked into my eyes. He kissed my forehead a few times before going back to hugging me. 

I really hope that there is a cure to this.

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1159 words!

I HAVE PUMPED OUT  LIKE TWO CHAPTERS IN ONE MONTH HAHAH 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻 Sorry if this chapter is bad, I wrote 90% of it in the middle of the night and im really tired, I almost fell asleep on the keyboard HAHAAHHAHAH

TYSM FOR 300 READS !!! <333

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