When Everything is Nothing. (Niall Horan Fanfic)

Damaged

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~~~~~NIALL'S P.O.V.~~~~~

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Her laugh was like a remote control.

When it bubbled out, it muted everyone else around us: and it was just her and I.

And she was so beautiful, so wonderful, and with every second I spent with her I could see her opening up a little more. Opening up a little more from that wall that she had built up to keep everyone else out. I wanted more than anything to no longer be on the outside of that wall, I wanted to be able to love her.

But every time I got close, she would feel her emotional walls crashing down.

The laugh would stop, the eye-contact would break, her smile would disappear within an instant once she realized what she was doing.

And she would attempt to rebuild her walls as fast as she could, to the point where her attention would be consumed on not letting me into her mind.

She was so fragile to me, yet so esoteric. Those big beautiful brown eyes of hers held so many secrets, locked away, never to be able to be seen or known to anyone. So badly, I wanted to know how she felt, what she was thinking. I wanted to know if ever, possibly, I passed through her mind.

One could only hope that.

Whenever I twirled her around, the music guiding us, her big smile meeting me again after every rotation, I wished I could just freeze life and savor those perfect moments.

"I love this song." She whispered, as familiar guitar chords echoed amongst the dance floor. I pulled her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her waist. She draped her arms over my shoulders and leaned her head up against my chest.

"What day is it?

And in what month?

This clock never seemed so alive.

I can't keep up, and I can't back down,

I've been losing so much time," she hummed softly, singing along.

"Cause it's you and me,

And all of the people with nothing to do,

Nothing to lose.

And it's you and me,

And all other people,

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you," the music echoed.

The song continued on, as the whole rest of the people in the club were completely shut out from my mind.

As we gently rocked back and forth,

Inseparable,

And that was exactly how I wanted it to stay.

"Cause it's you and me,

And all of the people with nothing to do,

Nothing to lose.

And it's you and me,

And all other people,

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you,"

I pulled apart from her gently, keeping my arms around her, but creating a space in between us. Curious to my withdrawal, she glanced at me.

"There's something about you now,

I can't quite figure it out,"

I lifted my hand and placed it on her neck, gently tilting her head,

"Everything you do is beautiful,

everything you do is right."

I sang to her softly, changing the lyrics, whispering down her neck before planting a kiss below her ear.

I could feel her body tense up under my touch.

I attempted to calm her down, but she began shutting me out.

Her eyes grew dark, to the point where there was no distinguishing where her pupils ended and irises began.

Her touch became cold, as she pulled away from me.

"I have to leave." She stuttered abruptly before walking away, in a trance, pushing through the crowd of sweaty people dancing.

I weaved through the massive amount of teens in pursuit of her.

Finally, she reached the door to go outside, unaware of the fact that I was directly behind her.

"You can't do this, you know? You can't be like this." I spoke softly to her.

She reached for the doorknob and twisted the door open.

"All that I want to do is love you, if you give me the chance, I will help you."

Her body softened from its stiffened position, her arm falling down to her side. She didn't turn around, and yet, she didn't take another step away from me.

I spun her around and tilted her head up with one hand, wrapping my other around her dress, and pressed my lips to hers.

When we separated, she began to come back to me.

Golden flecks returned to her eyes,

Her skin returning back to its olive tone.

I breathed in deeply, finding the right words to sum up all of the discombobulation that was my mind. So many things I wanted her to do, yet I knew I would never force it upon her, she was different.

"Please. Let me love you."