Fragile Desires (18+) (GxG)

Fifty-Four | Not Badly Enough

It's a feeling you get right before a big performance.

Your heart hammers against your ribs, your palms slick with sweat.

You're terrified, yes, but there's also a spark of excitement, a secret knowledge that you're about to walk a tightrope.

The potential for a striking fall or a conquering leap is equally thrilling.

It's an addiction.

A dangerous one, fueled by the very system it seeks to defy.

Perhaps that's why I find myself drawn to trouble now and then.

Trouble feels like a necessary counterpoint to the cage of royal life.

It reminds me I'm alive, that I feel things intensely.

It fuels a dangerous fire in me that no one can put out.

Except for Renata.

- Azzy

♛Chapter Fifty-Four: Not Badly Enough♛

Renata had been silent the entire car ride back to the hotel, not sparing me a glance as she stared out of the tinted windows of the chauffeured SUV.

The rhythmic click of her short manicured nails against the door ledge was the only sound that dared intrude on our stifling silence.

It was a tense counterpoint to the engine's smoothness, a nervous tick that mirrored the knot twisting so deeply in my stomach.

It was tense.

Tenser than a diamond under a jeweler's lens, every flaw magnified a hundredfold.

Even the rhythmic whoosh of the tires sounded strained, like a forced breath between clenched teeth.

It was a tension that followed us through the hotel lobby, the plush carpets muffling the storm brewing within.

It clung to us like a second skin as we ascended in the elevator, the mirrored walls reflecting back our strained expressions.

And almost as soon as the door fell shut to our suite, Renata's stare was finally back on me, but with how precise it seemed to be...

I couldn't quite tell if that was a good thing.

"The dress," Renata finally said, walking past me into the bedroom.

I quickly followed behind her, "It's cute right?" I asked, smiling as our heels clicked against the floors, emerging into the bedroom.

Renata hummed tightly, stopping her long strides right by the bed, "The change of plans," she said, carefully rolling up the sleeves of her shirt.

I only shrugged, "It was only fair," I said, sliding my heels off.

Renata lazily raised her brows, "The bathroom," she said, her tone growing slightly tighter than before.

Meanwhile, my smile grew as I peered up at her beautiful face, noticing the frustration I caused on it, "You liked it," I murmured, drawing my hands up her slightly exposed arms.

But Renata only pulled away, shaking her head to herself, "The woman," she nearly gritted, glancing carefully between my eyes with a darkened look.

I sighed contently, "That was a nice touch," I determined, staring up into her eyes, feeling completely unfazed.