Closer To You

20

Taehyung's P.O.V

I woke up the next day, past noon, with a hella hangover and Jungkookie sleeping soundly next to me. I coo at the sight and caress his bread cheeks, tickling the soft skin of his face. He scrunches his nose, and his pout becomes more pout-y. I want to smother him in kisses and cuddle him forever, but I hold back from doing so just to keep admiring his features. It was a few minutes before I gave in to my urges and lightly pecked the younger's lips. But it felt so good, godly. I lean back in and kiss him harder, forcing his mouth open. Damn, it feels so good to be dominant for once, to be the one to shove their tongue in the other's mouth. Fuck, it felt too good. My happiness was short-lived when, suddenly, Jungkook flipped me over, hovering over me, but not once pulling away. 

"Well, that certainly was once interesting 'Good morning'," Jungkook mumbles against my lips. He forces himself onto me again. I smile in the kiss, letting Jungkook explore my mouth with his tongue, sucking and licking my own. I was getting more and more aroused when Jungkook fully pulled away from me, jumping off the bed. I whine. "We had sex last night," he groans. "I might fully wreck your ass if we go again."

"But I want it," I whine with a growing pout. "I wanna have more fun," I say with a smirk. He rolls his eyes and I start making the bed. "It might be the last time before I have to leave, back to Kore-" I stop myself. Fuck I actually forgot that I can't live here. I actually fucking forgot. 

"Don't remind me," Jungkook says, his voice going dark, quite. 

"I'm sorry," I say, reaching out to him. He grabs my hand, pulling me toward him.

"It's all fine, but just, don't remind me until you actually have to leave," he whispers against my ear. I nod and place my head on his chest. 

"I love you," I mumble into his shirt. He doesn't say anything back. I lift my head. "I said, I love you," I repeat. He just looks into my eyes. "Do you not love me?" I start worrying and I start feeling a ball of emotion in my throat. 

"I do, I just don't know how to say it yet," he says quietly. I start overthinking it all. 

"So you don't love me?"

"Baby, don't take it wrong, I do, I just can't say it."

"Why?"

"Remember what my job is and how long it's been since I broke up with Lisa," he reminds me. "And don't forget that my mom would kill me if I said any of that shit to a man."

"Fuck all of that and tell me that you love me if you mean it."

"I fucking can't!"

"Fine, then I fucking hate you," I say, turning my back to Jungkook and crossing my arms. He comes behind me and hugs my back. "Get away from me." I feel tears sting my eyes. For the second time, I'm gonna have my heart broken by him. 

"But I love you," he whispers. 

"Too late," I say bluntly.

"Why?"

"Because I'm not accepting your words."

"I'm sorry for not saying it sooner."

"Nope," I shove his words and him out of my mind.

"I'm sorry for breaking your heart for the second time," He cries.

I don't reply. So, he doesn't say anything. Throughout the rest of the day, I spent my time with Jimin and Hobi hyung, and Jin hyung. Jungkook spent his time either working on his music with Yoongi or laughing his ass off with Namjoon about something Minjoon said. Oh, how I miss that Elmo-like laugh of his. I feel a pang in my heart every time that we made eye contact or every time that he got a little too touchy with someone. 

I snap out of my thoughts when Jimin says, "What's up with you and Kookie?"

"Nothing, just got into a minor fight."

"About what?"

"Nothing much."

Now it was Hobi Hyung. "About what, Taehyung?"

"Fine, he wouldn't tell me that he loves me," my voice breaks.

"He did what?!" Jin almost shouts, making Namjoon drop his plastic cup of whatever he was drinking and Yoongi breaking into fits of laughter. Jimin joins him, falling off his seat and not being able to get up. Soon enough, Hobi hyung was also laughing while Jin just started at the whole mess. In the midst of all of this, I feel eyes glaring at me. I look over at the source, only to find Jungkook, staring at me with those beautiful doe eyes of his. I look away almost immediately and chew the inside of my cheek. I notice the way he looks away and rolls his tongue against his cheek.

After everyone calmed down, Minjoon now in Jin's arms, I told the story to the other three of them. "It's because of how his life is right now, Taehyungie," Jimin tires to console me. 

"Okay, but he should be able to say that he loves me, right?"

"Tae, his life is a lot different from ours. One wrong move and everyone's gonna be all over him," Hobi hyung says.

"Besides, from the way that you guys fucked last night, he definitely loves you," Jimin jokes. I blush hard and the three of them laugh. 

"What does that mean?" Minjoon asks in his suddenly high-pitched, four-year-old voice. Now, the rest of us, excluding Jin and Namjoon were having a good laugh. Namjoon facepalms while Jin does his best to give his son the incorrect definition and tell him to never repeat the phrase ever in his life, even though we all know that he will.

Everything was fine until the others had to leave. We had two more days, including tomorrow, before we had to go, so we were all packing up and shit. I still slept with Jungkook that night, needing someone with me after all this time, but I just didn't cuddle him, like I usually did. 

"I love you," I heard in my ear. 

"And I fucking hate you," I say quite loudly. Of course I didn't mean it, but it sure felt like I did.

I couldn't fall asleep, but I had my eyes shut. So, Jungkook must have thought I had fallen asleep.

"I love you 3000," I whispers in my ear. "And next time, I'll promise to bring you flowers." I could feel a light tear fall onto my cheek, from Jungkook. I squeeze my eyes shut and keep the tears from seeping through my eyes when I feel Jungkook's weight lift from the bed. I had no idea where he was going, and I most certainly did not want to know.

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Kay guys, one more chapter to go!

Help, I don't think I'm ready to write the last chapter of this, even though I've been planning it for some time now. 

Y'know, I've had a lot of fun writing this, even when none of you commented, but it's all good, and that's not sarcasm. 

Both of these books were actually my firsts, so I wanted to say:

THANK YOU FOR THE MORE THE 1.4K READS ON I STILL WANT YOU!!

I'm being so fr rn thx for that

ALso thx for sticking with me all this way. It's been hard for me and this weird thing of not being able to update for months. 

*Wipes tears* can't wait for the last chap

Thx 💜