The Death of Our Innocence (Dead Plate Swap AU)

Destroy Me From The Inside Out

A/N: Hii everyone! Thank you to everyone who's been supportive so far. I appreciate every bit of your support and feedback. ♥

Tw: Blood drinking

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"I don't know what's wrong with me."

Rody's features are twisted into a troubled expression, his brows furrowed as he keeps his gaze low.

A warm body presses up against his side, long arms swathing around his form and not leaving him much room to breathe. A tender voice brushes against his ear, slightly distorted, to the point he almost cannot recognize it.

"What do you mean?"

Its tone remains mellow. So painfully familiar. He leans into the embrace of the known and forgotten, throat tightening with the urge to cry like a little child.

"I know I'm helpless. It's been so long. I know you've moved on from me. But it still feels like a part of me is still missing without you here."

Sometimes, it feels like he is stuck in time. Like everyone is walking past him, moving on, going forward, while he remains static no matter how much he tries. Torn between wanting to live the rest of his life and wanting to relive the comforting memories of the past.

What he wouldn't give to go back in time, just for a few moments. To replicate the feeling he felt when he was with him for just a split second. The silent reassurance that everything would be alright. That he wasn't alone.

That his person was right there, and would always be there.

Friend groups would come and go and romance would flourish then fade, but his bond with him would remain unbreakable.

"I can't move on. I can't move forward. I still think about you all the time. It doesn't feel right. Life just doesn't feel right without you here."

He cries just like he did back then. With the same sorrow. The same desperation. The knowledge that it was all lost. All he loved turning to dust against his fingertips the moment he reached out to touch it.

Destined to watch everything and everyone he has ever cherished leave him behind.

Another lesson.

Another experience that would 'make him stronger'.

"I don't understand it. I've moved on from my past girlfriends within a few months after the breakup. But you.."

But it didn't make him stronger.

The more beat down he got, the harder it was to get back up. It hurts more when the person who once was his shelter is now the cause of all this agony that swirls within his bleeding heart.

Where is his Vincent to pick him back up now? He can't do it alone. His chest is too heavy. Hid limbs won't move.

Why is he alone?

"I haven't been able to be happy about anything I've accomplished. I want you to be there to celebrate it with me too. I wonder if you'd be proud of me. If you'd be happy for me."

Rody squeezes one of the hands loosely draped around his neck, trying in any way he can to replicate their warmth by digging deep into his memories.