REMIND HER HER REMINDER

BUILD

Oh how much i hate having sleepless nights .....Ive got one week left to my leave and im so excited yet im still completely baffled.I feel like times flying and im not even catching up with my emotions......I feel like I'm supposed to be unlocking a new realm in the physical world that's called acceptance and letting go ....
But i cant find the key to it...
It scares me that the more i delay the less id gain.....

Im scared and happy at the same time too .....Im low yet high on weed...im grumpy but relaxed ....Im at peace but still at war.

I told yall Ali came back is it??

I really miss how i fell for that Motherfucker...oh how much i enjoy the "strange strangers era"before it turns out being some major arguement or fight or beef or shit you feel me ...every time i meet someone so good i ask myself how we finna deal with the first misunderstanding we encounter.

At the moment im trynna keep that era between me and Wanaina....I don't want to hurt him .....I'd hate myself if I did so .i say that alot ....and he thinks im a fool yet thats the truth.

I started falling for him but im about to start a whole new relationship with someone else....Im so scared of dating this white i dont know why....

In my head im still fantasizing my life w some black boy whose all saved and not only knows but accepts Christ........ whos all romantic all loving and caring ...and who can cook good ...BRO A MAN THAT COOKS GOOD GETS AN EASIER WAY TO MY COOCHIE THAN A MAN W A GOOD COCK!!!

Capp!!!

Lets say 50/50

But a man that cooks has my heart for real for real....bett Ali had all ways winning me ...he just fucked up big time......

Just picked up Tina from the Airport,she looked so drained and exhausted....I'm so happy she's back
Now I can relate to the reel that says " little do my friends know that when I'm w them ,they heal me"especially when im w her ,Salome ,Dalvo and Diana .....sometimes with Bilal......and online ofc its with Elias....
Lately Elias been so caught up with attachment and we talk less... i told him I'm scared of losing him cos of how he puts himself into work that he forgets about me ....

Anyway back to the white man.

The white dude surprised me with flowers and chocolates at work....

It was such a precious moment i tell you...
All eyes were on me ... from my boss to both the customers and colleagues.

I worry that hes winning me yet all i wanted was some fucking black nigga!!
I be arguing with myself bout how dumb i am...
Plainly i aint got anyone on me ...i even stopped smashing with my sneakylink ....The last time he was at my crib i asked him when he finna take me for a proper date cos i serve him good pussy and he just smiled and said "USIJALI"

It sounded offensive.
You prolly wondering why id ask my sneaky to take me out for a date  yet we sneakies!!!!

Well i wasnt feeling like fucking w him at that moment or any other coming day and i didnt want to fake moans and shii so i had to switch the topic and his emotions too...I even asked him to help me find my next OOTD!!!Plus I done been with him for quite sometime and he amongst them "I wanted to get you ...I'm goin to get you......I promise I'll get you....next time I'll come with it ...."but never gets to happens...But I'm used to all those phrases ...
My step dad used them a lot so I'm not new to them at all .

He was pissed as fuck but he tried to compose himself and as he left ,he just had this tone of some ghetto hood nigga that made my aptitude just feel like I should cut strings with him depiste us practicing no strings attached ...