can i sleep forever

three

!!SA WARNING!!

i've learned why it's hard for me to comfort people when they are making me uncomfortable or just telling them no. and it all has to do with my older cousin. from the things that happened when i was younger.

i didn't know how to say no i was just a kid at the age of 6 he was in high school. i didn't know what he was doing was wrong i wasn't told anything. that having someone do that was bad. why would my parents have to worry about things going on at my grandparents.

not only a few months ago did i finally say something about it. i thought people wouldn't believe me that my family wouldn't believe me. because my aunt accused me of doing something to my little cousin. all because of the way we were sitting.

she should have been busy thinking about what her son was doing to his little cousin. and not accusing me of doing something. and a few months later she told my mother that she was just triggered. because that happened to one of her friends when they were kids. she knew i didn't do anything.

my entire family on my dad side knew what happened that day at my cousins house. they knew what my aunt did was wrong. but they didn't say anything it was just saying it wasn't any of their business. that incident had me not taking or seeing my dad's family for a bit. the only reason anything happened that had me seeing them was my grandma being upset. because my mother was keeping her granddaughter from her.

so all because of that cousin i don't know how to tell people that they are making me uncomfortable or even to tell them no. because that was something that i didn't know how to do when i was younger. and it's just something that has followed me.