can i sleep forever

twenty

if you were to ask me the last time i felt really truly happy was december 27th 2024 i loved everything about that day. i was with someone truly special to me someone that ment absolutely everything to me. if i had to give an exact moment of when i was at my happiest it was around 7pm that day we were sitting outside of the mall that a table it was dark the lights were on.

we were sitting at this table just the two of us sitting across from each other. that's the place we had our first kiss that's the place i had my first kiss. everything about it to me was absolutely perfect. so that would be my answer for the time i felt the happiness.

now if you were to ask the time i felt the saddest that would be march 11th 2025 getting that message asking if we could talk i didn't think that would lead to getting broken up with. after reading those messages all i could do was cry. i called my best friend not knowing if she would answer because of how late it was thankfully she answered. hen she answered i just started crying again she stayed on the phone with me for almost an hour before i called my dad.

i was the first time i've ever called my dad crying he asked what was wrong which just made me cry even more. i stayed home from school for a few days i had no motivation to do anything. i felt like when i went back to school i had like nothing was wrong. but being at school seeing people in relationships made me want to find the closest cliff and jump.
and i wold be lying now if i said it still doesn't hurt every time i see something about new relationship he's in i feel hurt and angry.