twenty six

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always listen to gut feelings.

i assumed that i was overthinking the severity of the situation on my walk home, because of that anxious feeling in my heart. i realize it turns out that it was in fact warning me of conflict. that is, with my sister.

seeing how she had glared at me with daggers in her eyes, i knew i was about to go for another round of an emotional rollercoaster. i hate this the most, because hyojung is my biggest supporter and one of my absolute favorite people.

"i'm assuming junghyun told you about what happened last night," i felt small, standing in the doorframe of my sister's room. it was as if i were seven years old again and had just hid my report card from my parents but my sister found out.

she dropped the garment in her hands and crossed her arms, indicating she was likely about to criticize me.

"do you know how dangerous and reckless you were?" she asks, waiting for my response. her sparkling eyes now filled with anger scans my face, reading the look of uneasiness in my expression.

"i know. but he left out the part where i got spiked and he assaulted me, did he tell you that?" i abandoned my friendly tone with her too. the way she was being so defensive for her fiance that gives her nothing but stress, absolutely ticked me off.

"hyojin, you wore almost nothing to that party and got so intoxicated because you were careless. thank god he was there to check up on you if you were okay, but to thank him your boyfriend beat the shit out of him?" the level of hyojung's voice began to rise.

"i don't disagree that i was not in the proper mind but i don't doubt what happened to me. i clearly saw him sitting close to me, touching my leg and he eventually slid his hand under my skirt. what he did was literal sexual assault, why else would my boyfriend put his hands on junghyun?" anger crept into my insides, almost causing me to shake.

"what assault, hyojin? if you've forgotten, he's engaged to me and barely even speaks to you because you hate him so much. so i'm supposed to believe that when he spotted his fiancee's sister almost blacked out in his living room, he's just going to assault her like that?" hyojung's words absolutely baffled me right now. she turns away and mutters curses to herself. this should be the last topic on earth to be questioning me about.

"you're fucking telling me you don't believe me? you didn't see jack shit with your own eyes and you decide to believe the perpetuator instead of the victim? you're supposed to be the last person on fucking earth to abandon me like that!" i had raised my voice too as well. betrayal could not have been any more bitter.

"i did see it with my own eyes." she turned around to blink at me, with not a hint of empathy in her eyes for my distress.

"i had dinner with junghyun and his parents last night. the two of us stopped by his house afterwards so he could grab his golf equipment because that's where we were heading. to my surprise, he sends me a photo of my own sister almost passed out on his couch. he told me to hurry and get you, but by the time i arrived both junghyun and seojun were being restrained by furthering hitting each other. so yes, with my own fucking eyes i saw the mess that you created while you stood there watching it all happen," hyojung spat. she had opened her phone and flipped it around to see a photo of the living room from last night, dark but illuminated by the disco lights. i was in fact, slumped over on the couch.

and also, hyojung wasn't working a late shift last night as dad had mentioned. why was she lying to him?

at this point, tears welled in my eyes for the goddamn nth time in the past 24 hours. i'm not going to cry.

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