Waiting For Things To Get Better - Angeldust Angst

Short Dad (Chapter 16 )

I don't think there's any trigger warnings in here? It's mostly wholesome.

Lucifer stepped outside, looking around. Angel didn't go far, he walked to the bridge nearby. He lit a cigarette, leaning on the rail.

Lucifer slowly approached, his hands behind his back. “Hey, how you feelin?” He asked, standing next to him.

Angel blew smoke out, sighing. “I dunno.” He said, avoiding looking at him. Lucifer glanced up at the sky, sighing.

“They're not kicking you out for good. I didn't even know this is what they had planned. You go through a lot, and it's perfectly reasonable to act the way you do.”

“Why? It's not like it's your problem to deal with. I'm just a sinner at your daughter's hotel. It doesn't matter if I get kicked out.”

Lucifer shook his head. “You are much more than that. Yeah, sure, you're a sinner, and you stay here with Charlie. But Charlie really cares about you. I can tell you aren't here because you did something. You are here for other reasons.”

Angel glanced down at the short king. “I care about my people. I see so many people lose themselves, and that isn't what this place is about. Charlie's idea may be insane, and hard to believe, but it sure as hell is a good one. You're one of the best examples, I know it sounds bad to call you one.”

Lucifer glanced up at Angel. “But you've made a lot of progress since the last extermination. I know I'm not always here, but I'm proud of how far you've come as a person, and as Charlie's friend. I've never seen her so persistent in protecting someone.”

“What is there to be proud of? I'm just- I'm fucked up. I've hurt her- I- I fuck up all the time, thats not something to be proud of.” “Sure it is. You keep trying. That's what's good. As far as I'm concerned, you've been clean for some time now. But youre forgetting who you are.”

Angel furrowed his brows. “What-?” “You have to keep your wits, Angel. You have to know yourself, and sometimes you have to know who you came here with. You won't get anywhere without yourself. You have to be ready for anything and everything here. You know that.”

Angel looked at the Pentagram in the sky, sighing. “You're saying this because I'm friends with Charlie.” “No. I'm saying this because you're a friend. I'm not supposed to be friends with my people, but it doesn't hurt. You're trying really hard to be good, buy you let your sorrows get the best of you. You can't let that happen. You have to keep fighting. But you can't fight for nothing.”

“Then what do I fight for?” “You're looking for redemption, aren't you? How many siblings did you have when you were alive?” “Why?”

“Just answer.” “2.” “are they both down here?” “No.” “Then fight for the other one.”

“What if I can't redeem myself?” “I doubt that. You have something to fight for. I'm sure if that brother or sister remembers you, they'd be thrilled to reunite.”

Angel chewed on his cheek. “But what about my brother?” “Does he have room to change?” “I- I don't know..”

Lucifer shook his head. “Then don't worry about it. Fight for your sister. Fight for freedom. Fight for yourself. When's the last time you truly felt like yourself?”

Angel took a hit of the cigarette, looking down. “I don't know.” “Then that needs to change. How can your soul change if you don't remember your soul?”

Angel sighed, blowing out smoke. “You and Charlie have a lot in common. You both try to save everyone else but yourself. You are destroying yourself. You're too busy saving everybody else. You need to save yourself.”