𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙗𝙞𝙙𝙙𝙚𝙣 𝘿𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙨

16.Drunk🖤🤍

James's POV

"I like you Jan Chaiyasing"

I finally said it. Wow... I really confessed. But... Why don't I feel relieved?

Was this confession for someone else?

No... I like this girl in front of me. Even though she back stabbed me by leaving... I still like her. I do right?

I waited for her to say yes. She can't say no to me. Right? I'm the James Supamongkon people dies to want even if my hands are tainted with blood.

My lips curled into a smile, waiting for her response but I saw how her eyes saddened. she likes me too right?

"W-what?" She said something finally but not the fucking thing I wanted.

"I like you silly"

"But I don't"

I blinked, once then twice. My mind stopped working as I stared at her. She said that with such a straight face. Do my feelings not fucking matter?

"What are you saying?" James asked

"I said I don't like you" Jan said

Again.

Were my feelings all alone one sided?

I saw her trembling. Was she lying? Yes she was lying... She can't reject me like this.

I walked to her before grabbing her wrist making her look at me with widen eyes. Those eyes which held emotions called... Fear.

"What are you doing?!"

"Don't lie... I know you like me too"

"I don't! Why is it so h-hard for you to understand this?" Jan asked

"Cause you're lying... You used to like me back then and you still do. I know... I just know" I said

"What the fuck is wrong with you?! Yes I used to like you... Used to!" Jan said

My heart felt like breaking. No no no... No one can break my heart.

"You are lying! Why won't you like me!" I asked to her

"Cause you've become the person I feared you will! Someone who kills people without a second thought! Hand covered in blood! Clothes covered in blood! Face covered in blood! You're not even a human! How do you expect me to love someone like you?!" Jan asked angrily

Pain.

I felt pain.

She was right. I became the person we both feared I will...

But I can't back off from what I became... so how can she say all that to me?

Not a human?

Right... Not even a human. I became a monster whom she will never love.

"You mean it?" I asked blankly hoping she'll say no.

"Yes, I mean every word. You don't deserve my love!" Jan said

My knees felt like jelly. I really wanted to walk away but won't it make me a coward? I can't ruin my cold image right?

"Get out" I said almost in a whisper.

"What?" she asked

"Get the fuck out of my house and my life!" I said clenching my fists tightly.

I really didn't mean to say these. I wanted to hug her and tell I'll try my best to become who she can be proud to love.

But my ego came in way.