Crimson Eyes {{Katsuki Bakugo X Reader}}

39

"this is so dumb!" I groaned, burring my face into mina's pillow.

"Can't relate," Mina deadpanned, causing me to groan yet again.

"Minaaaa," I whined, turning my head to look at my pink friend. She gave an apologetic smile.

"Bestie, listen. You gotta figure out these feelings. Be honest with yourself. And obviously then be honest with Bakugo."

"It's so confusing though. The way I felt now somehow seems different from how I felt when I was younger. The school girl crush from our childhood seems so distant. Now it's like..." I rubbed my temples in an attempt to find the word.

"You only want his dick?" 

"No!"

"So you dont want to have sex with him?" she asked coyly. 

"Mina!!" I laughed. "Yes, I do, but thats not the subject art hand currently!" I playful threw one of her stuffed animals at her. "I want to understand my feelings. And I want to know where his stance is. I don't want a situationship, or whatever they're called." It had been a couple days sense the sports fest ended and we would be returning to school in two days. Kacchan and i had texted and talked on the phone a few times, but that was it.

"So you want an actual relationship with him?" 

"I-" I took a deep inhale. What did I want? How do I feel? I went over everything in my head. I played all the moments we've shared, analyzing every detail. Is there something I missed in how we acted? Were the signs there or pretend? Whats really-

"You're mumbling like Midoriya and it's creeping me out," Mina laughed. I let out a breathy chuckle, readjusting so i was on my back and looking up at the ceiling. 

"Mina... what if its a different feeling... because we're different people now?" I heard her sigh.

"Thats honestly probably the reality. You're both grown, in college, and have been through many things. Together and one your own separate paths." I nodded, knowing she was right. "Sweetie, close your eyes." I gave her a weird look. "I'm serious!" I rolled my eyes, by followed her instructions regardless. "Picture him. His face. His voice. His smile. Wait, does he smile anyway other than in a crazy way?" 

"Mina..." I opened my eyes to give her the side eye.

"Sorry! Now Shh! Eyes shut!" I chuckled at her and resumed obeying. I listened to her words as she walked me through what to see. "How do you feel when he smiles at you? Do you get butterflies? When he hugs you, does your heart pound? When he gets angry, how do you feel? What about when he yells? Do those feelings outweigh the soft ones? Look it all, the small details AND the big picture. How do you feel? Now, after all of that, what does your heart say?" I opened my eyes as soft tears started to form. 

"Mina..." She looked at me tenderly. "Mina I..." I heard my phone ding. I grabbed it and checked to see who was texting me. "Kacchan wants me to meet him at the park. I'll tell him i'm busy and-"