The list of sinners

...Celia...

Dad was everything that had remained with me in this life. He was the extinguisher of my problems, the light when I couldn't see the way, the strength and sweetness that kept me going and gave me good energy. A cheerleader for my desires and a great defender. But I never thought about how the secrets and lies would spread like cancer in my life, leaving nothing inside me but strong doubt and distance like the one I had created that brought a crisis to our bond.

I tried to do the same thing with my attention as I had done with my sight that I had thrown out the small window. I watched houses and trees mix at the speed of the car, and the green and brown color prevailed. I was leaning on the back seat of the car, tapping my fingers on my mother's notebook that I held tightly, which I didn't dare to open during my stay at home. I had only managed to read the first page during the journey, where it said that the diary was the travels of her soul through the valleys of darkness and light. It also continued that without her honest words, it would be nothing but an object, and that with them, it was a portal for the spirit, a map of journeys and efforts to become angelic.

After reading those words, I quickly closed the diary. The valleys of darkness and light. Those words haunted me. I was confused. I thought that there could be nothing there other than lines with my mother's most beautiful memories. But when I thought that the diary was hidden in a well-thought-out way, I was scared of what this diary might have reserved. The shaking of the car woke me from the thoughts that spun around me like dark clouds. Even though it took five days to start college, I was going back to my "other" home.

As I entered Connecticut, I noticed small snowflakes clinging to the car window. I had never seen snow in my life except on TV. Where I come from, winter days require only a jacket at most. Many people don't like winter days, but for me, they are a beautiful poem. These winter times invite you to find wonders, to find the eternal in the simple. You can find wonders in icicles formed on the edges of houses and even in frozen ponds.

The car stopped at the side of the road as it did the first time. I got out of the car, taking my suitcases filled with clothes even though I needed to buy warmer ones now. My breath rose and swirled in the cold air as if it had been blurred by a painter's brush on a canvas. I took out the sky-blue backpack and handed the money to the driver that I owed.

The car left, leaving behind only a trail of smoke reinforced by the icy air. My good fortune was that the snow had stopped, but pulling the suitcases was more difficult amidst the snow that had settled crosswise. As I walked, my phone vibrated. I picked it up and looked at the screen. It was an unknown number.

"Hello?" I said, almost in question.

"Celia?"

"Donovan?!" I said, recognizing his voice.

"Listen to me for a moment... I need you to come to my house... my house. I need your help..."

"What's..."

"I don't have much time to talk, but please... come as quickly as you can."

The phone hung up, leaving the repeated "beep" sound echoing in the lethargic sleep. I felt the blood flowing easily through my body as if it had been hollowed out too much. With those words he managed to extract and the pauses filled with breath, they left nothing else in my heart but signs of an impending danger.

"My dear heart," I said, putting my hand on it. "Please stop involving yourself everywhere, your job is to pump blood."

Lost in various thoughts, I arrived in front of Donovan's house with my two suitcases in hand, my heart almost ready to jump out of my chest with excitement. His car was parked on the side of the road, which was unusual. The footprints left behind were disturbed and seemed almost dragged. Bloodstains extended to the door on the car window.