Therapy // 5sos au

Chapter 3

··Maegan··

"Which one of you wants to go first" Janet said since everyone had shared and it was now down to me and this girl named Zee.

I just shrugged my shoulders and looked down at my scuffed up vans.

"Neither of you will be judged here its a judgement free zone." Janet said and I scoffed finally looking up getting pissed.

"Fine I will go." I said and stood up and looked around the room trying to figure out which was my best way to bolt out of here.

"Thank you Maegan." Janet said and smiled crossing her legs.

Luke moved close to the edge of his seat and that's when it happened. I ran. I ran as fast as my feet could carry me holding all my things and feeling my back pack go up and down as it was weightless to my running. I hit the door as hard as I could and made my way outside to the outside world. I put my arms out wide and felt alive. Running gave me a high. It made my chest hurt so bad and i couldn't feel myself breathing because it was so strangled. I sat outside by the trash cans taking out a lighter and let it burn for a little while before lifting my finger off the button before rolling my finger to light it again.

"You really shouldn't be doing that." The boy who i saw early and learned his name was Ashton.

"You know I really don't want to talk about my problems." I said as he sat down beside me.

"You know Janet means well and your parents meant well by putting you in the group right?" Ashton said and slowly put out his hand. "My name is Ashton by the way. I uh I used to burn. Its not good to." He muttered.

"Yeah I know its not and it gives you one ugly ass scar but i mean so does a razor and scrapes and being hit by a car." I mumbled and Ashton let out a slight laugh.

"You've been hit by a car?" He asked almost as if it was a joke.

"Yeah I got hit out in the parking lot early. I uh I got some good painkillers in my bag. So i figured might was well use them. Let me to you never ever jump out in front of a car you are most likely going to live." I told him and chuckled.

"Who hit you like someone in there is that why you won't open up cause i mean you are to me." He said softly.

"By one of there family members but no that isn't the reason I just don't want to talk in front of people. I never really have enjoyed talking in front of people its not my type of thing. I usually run away from my problems that what i am good at you know?" I whispered and Ashton looked up at the wall.

"Yeah I know what you mean. So since you won't open up to the people inside how about just me?" He asked and I shrugged.

"I guess." I muttered.

"Okay so uh how many siblings do you have?" He asked and looked at me his hazel eyes staring into mine and his dorky smile and dimples.

"I have a twin sister and a dead older brother. than my 7 half siblings." I said softly kind of afraid how he would react.

"I have a brother and a sister." He said and put his hand forward telling me to go on.

"Do you know any other languages?" I asked and he shook his head.

"No just sign and English."

"I know sign language as well." I muttered and he looked at me confused.

"So do you like wanna try and talk to Mike than he is a nice guy and I mean you could pour your heart out to him and he wouldn't say anything back to you." Ash made a pun and i just giggled along.

··Zee··

"I um Ashton will you go get her." Janet said and everyone in the group looked kind of shocked or like they didn't care that one of the people just ran out and for all we know she could be killing herself right now.

"I guess I will be going than." I said super softly and Michael looked at me with pleading hopeful eyes.

"If you want." Janet said and sat back in her chair.

"I am Zee. I uh I want to be called Zee. I'm here because my brother found some sleeping pills in my room and my mom just thinks that now because i am not super girly and i am no longer her little girl i am depressed that I need help. I have social anxiety and right now i feel like i am going to vomit because i never do this." I started to ramble unsure of what to say and what they would say back.

Michael did something that caught my attention. He grabbed my hand and pulled on it slightly and he took out his phone typing in a blank note. 'its okay'

I don't know what came over me next. The fact no one had said and word and wasn't judging me but honestly seemed into this group thing. I noticed the girl, Maegan, and the boy, Ashton, were not back yet.

Janet had given us a few moment to chat with each other trying to make friends with the same difficulties and struggles as us so we could 'bond'. I suddenly became curious when Maegan came back in the group with Ashton and went over to Janet to appolgize.

I mean she kind of needed to appolgize for running out and probably worrying Janet. Janet said a few things to her and she nodded still holding on tightly to her penny board. I was kind of envious. She was so pretty she shouldn't be having problems she is to pretty.

"Trying to figure out what is wrong with her?" Someone murmured startling me.

"Yea I mean I guess I am." I said and turned around noticing it was Luke.

He had another boy with him who I learned his name was Calum. He had family problems and social anxiety to be perfect to his family when he just felt like he was slowly killing himself one small peice or slice at a time. I guessed that meant he was cutting himself. I kept looking at the girl maegan wondering.

Why won't she talk to us?

"Okay guys I am going to set you up into groups. In these group I would like you to share your phone numbers with one another and I want you to trust one another you are here to get better.." Janet said and we nodded.

"Okay first group. Matthew, Ryland, Richard, Marcus and Kyle..." Janet kept reading off names i finally decided to listen in again and right in time. "Last group. Group 4 Luke, Maegan, Ashton, Calum, Michael and Zee." She gave us 5 minutes to exchange numbers and than let us leave. I walked out with my group and Luke decided to try and make small talk.

"Why don't we try and do something tonight guys like its only.." He looked down at his watch. "5:34 We could catch a movie than get a bite to eat if you want.." He suggested and we nodded in agreement.

"Okay lets do it but can we in a few hours I need to change and tell my parents where i am going if we all have iphones which i noticed we do i will make a group convo and we can meet at my house if you want." Maegan suggested and we all looked at her curiously, this was only the second time i heard her talk. She got a chorus of 'sure' and 'thats fine'.

"So see you all soon." She muttered and we all departed going out seperate ways.. either to shitty home lifes of places where we didn't feel safe and alright but we were going to test our limits. But mainly we are trying together.